For lots of people in relationships, back to school also means back to long distance, or possibly trying long distance for the first time. To be honest, it is hard. But nothing frustrates me more than people who just don't understand it. People don't see why you would stay with a person if they were so far away from you. For anyone who would like to try to understand it or is considering trying a long distance relationship with someone, I hope this clarifies something.
The main thing that people don't understand about long distance relationships is this: Proximity is not intimacy. People confuse these basic terms on a daily basis. We all want to have a deep connection with someone, and we often think that we can achieve that simply by being physically close to that person. Because of this, no one understands how someone could possibly have an intimate relationship with someone else if they cannot see that person and be with them constantly.
We live in a time when the world is at our fingertips. We crave immediacy like air; we want everything as soon as possible. Our entire lives are like microwaved dinners, we compromise quality for something that is quick and easy. Sadly, this is often the case for our relationships as well, and no one seems to notice it. We want love, but we don't want to take the time for it or make the commitment. We trade the love we want for short, physical relationships that feel like love for a little bit. It's not the real thing, but it makes you feel good for a short amount of time and it's faster than taking the time to get to know someone. Not only that, but our culture has made it so that quick, meaningless relationships are now just part of the fun of life, to the point where using another person for your enjoyment.
Being the introvert that I am, I was never the kind of girl that got asked out on dates or to dances. Looking back, however, I never feel like I missed out on anything. Being with one person for what seems like forever is not any less fun or exciting than meeting and being with new people all the time. People are so intelligent and beautiful and there is no greater adventure than having the opportunity to get to know and understand every single part of someone. Long distance has actually made me and my boyfriend closer. Like anything, it is a learning experience, but dealing with the change and the struggles only make you stronger in the end.
