3,000 children under the age of 20 are diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia, more commonly know as ALL, in the United States each year. On November 10, 2011 I became one of those 3,000.
I had been feeling sick off and on for several weeks with flu like symptoms; unable to eat, feeling weak and constantly tired. After missing weeks of school and determined to figure out what was wrong, my mom set up an appointment with my doctor. We arrived and went through the typical routine; the nurse checked my height, weight, temperature and collected all the necessary information of symptoms and reasons for coming in.
The doctor came in shortly after and began discussing what had been going on and proceeded to ask the question, “have you intentionally been trying to lose 15 pounds in the past three months?” I was shocked by this question because I had not even realized that this was occurring and definitely was not purposefully trying to lose weight. After hearing this response my doctor explained how he believed there was possibly some intestinal problem going on and that he wished to obtain a blood sample to help determine the precise cause of my symptoms.
My mom and I proceeded to walk over to the outpatient laboratory to get blood drawn. I was using the restroom and as I walked out my vision began to blur and I could not stand anymore. The nurse and my mom helped me over to a bed to lay down and drink some water. This was the moment I knew something was definitely not right within my body.
We returned home and my mom left to go grocery shopping, but not long after she left she called to say that we had to return to the doctor’s office to discuss some things and my dad would be meeting us there. Shortly after I received this news, my sister and brother-in-law showed up at my house unexpectedly to hang out until we left, and I sensed that something more serious than I had thought was occurring.
On the drive back to Akron Children’s Hospital to see my doctor the gut feeling set in and the thought of cancer flashed through my mind briefly, but I pushed it aside and thought there was no way that I could happen to me. I was proven incorrect though as the doctor sat the three of us down and explained that there was a high amount of abnormal white blood cells present in the blood sample that had been obtained. This meant I had leukemia.
It took a couple minutes for it to set in as the doctor continued talking, but it was one of those moments where everything thing he was saying sounded like a foreign language because all I could think about was that one word. Leukemia. I had heard of this before but was never actually aware of the medical definition of it and the treatment required . Immediately I became frozen with fear and overwhelmed with emotions.
The rest of the night went so fast as we made calls to family and friends to share the news and proceeded to get x-rays, go to the ER to meet the oncology doctors and team that would be dedicated to caring for me, and ending the night in a room on floor 5 that would be mine for a week and a half surrounded by some of my family and best friends. In that moment I had not yet fully processed or understood what this diagnosis meant and what the future, both near and far would entail.
How does a 14-year-old girl who just began her freshman year of high school comprehend that she will no longer be able to attend school like a normal teenager, but will instead exchange a social life and schoolwork for time in the hospital and knowledge of medicines and chemotherapy treatments? What good could possibly come of this? Even though I couldn’t see it then, there certainly was good in store, far more than I could have imagined. God had countless lessons, moments of growth, planned for the next couple of years that would bring such joy and healing, both physically and emotionally during some of the hardest years of my life.
I knew one thing for sure, I was determined to fight and beat this disease no matter what it took, and thus my journey began.
