While I am currently a junior here at Beloit, this is nonetheless my first semester here. I actually spent my first two years of college in the magical land of Hempstead, New York. Hempstead is a city on Long Island that is about 45 minutes away from Manhattan if you take the Long Island Rail Road. The school that is located in this particular place in the known universe is called Hofstra University, and it's where I spent the first two years of my college career as a Drama major.
Why did I want to go all the way to Long Island from my native land of Glendale, CA?
Given that I went through a major rebellious phase in high school, it was my priority to go far away from everything that I had known up until that point. This was convenient as I was already very fond of the East Coast and was especially eager to experience snow for the first time. A more specific reason why I chose this school is because of my will to be an actor and to excel at the performing arts. I had tried to get involved in theater in high school but was consistently rejected because I didn't have a great relationship with the man in charge of the school's productions. Because of the insecurity I felt due to my constant failure, I wanted to experience the confirmation that acting was something that I could do well and Hofstra had a solid reputation for it. Additionally, it was right next to New York City; what else could you possibly want?
My first two years:
Honestly, my first semester of college may well have been the greatest time in my life so far. There were a lot of experiences that I was able to have largely due to the progression of my own maturity. To keep it short, I was involved in more acting-related activities in the first semester than I was in my entire for years of high school! This ultimately gave me independence from my feelings of inadequacy. Probably the best thing that happened to me was that for the first time, I actually had a group of friends who liked me for the person that I actually was and not the series of facades that I put on in high school as a pathetic attempt at popularity. These friends remain some of the most fantastic and inspiring people that I know today and I cannot adequately express in words the gratitude I still feel for their existence. I also experienced the luxury of falling in love for the first time. Need I say more about that?
I had an amazing life at my former school. I almost had everything that I could ever ask for. I could have lived every day the exact same there for the rest of eternity, and I wouldn't have protested. As I became for self-aware of how I was changing, it became clear to me that I would not graduate from that school. As a drama major, I spent a decent amount of time researching the classes I would need to take in order to fulfill my major. My reactions to most of them were largely the same: "I really don't want to take this, but I have to for the sake of my major." At the same time, I realized how excited that I was getting for my science classes.
This sparked my long-lost interest in biology. Even though my laziness had gotten in the way of my success in the biological sciences, I was convinced that I had the inspiration that I needed in order to succeed. To make sure, I took the introductory class the following semester. Not only did I do well, but I loved it. I always looked forward to coming to class everyday and learning about what I consider to be the greatest story ever told: the evolution of life on earth. After taking biology, I decided I would like to focus in certain aspects of it and I researched the best small schools that could likely give me scholarships. For some reason, Beloit was my first choice.
Leaving:
This was definitely the hardest thing that I have ever had to do. I was going to give up a lot for what seemed to be a gamble. The fantastic social life I had built for myself, New York, and my best friend would all be gone. I was assured knowing that my academic future would be better at a different learning environment and that perhaps it could have been necessary for me to change my setting as I may have been a bit liberal with my emotional investments.
It also helped that after visiting and loving Beloit's campus, they sent me an admissions email saying that they were giving me the presidential scholarship. This basically meant that I would not have to take out any loans and that I would likely graduate debt-free. I felt it was only the logical choice.
The First Month:
This has definitely been an interesting adjustment. I had feared that it would be difficult for me to make friends and establish a social life because I would be coming in as a junior, where most people already have established their friend groups. While somewhat true, I had it easier than I thought I would and I have been consistently surprised at how friendly and welcoming everyone is. Although I acknowledge that I don't have the vast network of friends and acquaintances that I had at my former school had, I do accept that I wanted t give that up to pursue better academic success and better campus involvement. I am happy to say that so far I have done those things very well. It's almost crazy how many clubs and organizations I've joined. I'm in two positions in student government, I have a campus radio show, I'm involved in the Amnesty International club, and I'm in the school's rendition of Rocky Horror Picture Show just to name a few.
A lot of times when we change, it isn't obvious. It will often come as a random epiphany while walking across campus. You'll think "Wow, I don't have to worry about this anymore" or "It's crazy. I've matured so much. How did I not even notice it happen?". I've found that a stimulator of this process is visiting a familiar, unchanged place. This is precisely what I will be doing when I return home for fall break.
A very wise person that I know once told me "There is nothing like visiting an unchanged place to realize how much you've changed". This can be especially impactful since I'll feel nostalgic about everything. During my last week at my former school, I took a long walk across campus so that I could experience every angle of it one more time. Who even does that?
