To the Overachiever Who Fails — A Lot

I know that it can be hard to accept that everyone fails. This task can become especially hard when the one trying to accept failure is someone who overachieves and wants nothing more than to never fail. I know that all you want to do is succeed. But failing once in a while, or what feels like all the time, does not mean that you are a failure or that you are going to be a failure.

I know whether the failure seems large or small, it can still feel like you’ve ruined your future even if that is the furthest thing from the truth. I am no stranger to the downward spiral that can be associated with failure.“I can't do anything right,” and “how do I keep messing this up?!” are all thoughts that cross my mind when I fail.

I'm here to tell you, one overachiever who feels like she fails a lot to another, you do not fail as much or as often as you feel like you do. That overarching sense of having to do everything above and beyond all the time does not have to rule your life, and it shouldn't.

You are more than your sense of failure.

Everyone fails — even those who seem to have their life together. The most influential people in society have failed. Anyone who claims to never fail is wrong. They're worse off than those who acknowledge their failure.

If the overachievers in the world — or anyone for that matter — didn't fail, we would never grow as individuals or as a society. As much as I'd like to never fail, and as much as I'd love to save you the pain of failure, it would truly only cause more pain in the end because then no one would become the leaders that our society desperately needs.

Failure is essential to growth.

Failure is OK. The only time failure isn't OK, is when someone makes the choice to not grow from that failure. To grow from it is to accept it. Then, if something does go wrong again, as it most likely will, keep telling yourself that failure is OK and a part of life.

Making the decision to accept failure as a part of life and not let it get you down or kill your overachieving spirit is hard a hard one. One that will take some work to get to and will not happen overnight. The choice to work to accept failure and still have the spirit of an overachiever is a hard one — especially when you have an all or nothing mindset - but it is a choice that is worth all of the work that you put into it.

You can't fail at trying to accept failure as long as you always work towards it; music to the overachiever's ears.