The first R word that comes to mind for most people is "retarded." But there is a second one which many people throw around casually.
You really loved that new song and so you decided to say that you "raped the replay button." You lost in a game of basketball and so the other team "raped you." You miserably failed the test you pulled an all-nighter to study for and so you "got raped" by the professor and his or her test.
You get the idea.
Why do people feel the need to use such a vulgar word in order to convey their feelings? That "R word" should be reserved for what it truly means: "unlawful sexual intercourse or any other sexual penetration of the vagina, anus, or mouth of another person, with or without force, by a sex organ, other body part, or foreign object, without the consent of the victim," as provided by dictionary.com. Using the word rape as a part of everyday and casual conversation is something everyone needs to make a conscious effort to stop doing. There are so many other ways to convey the same level of emotion.
Drawing a blank? Here are a few ways of rephrasing the aforementioned statements: "That song was so amazing that I’ve replayed it X times," or "Man, we got destroyed in that game the other night,” or even “I just signed off on my death with that stats test." These are by far less offensive ways of saying essentially the same thing.
Rape victims and/or sexual assault victims can attest to the severity and depth of the emotions behind the "R word," and they most certainly do not think that your math test left you feeling that violated (contrary to what you may believe.) This crime is an obscene act which destroys many people's lives and humanity and using the same word for more minor occurrences is an insult to them. As a young woman who has had her "fair share" of close encounters with sexual assault, I can tell you how aggravating it is to overhear someone saying "Yo we got raped at that tennis match." (I put the fair share in quotes because the real fair share is nothing.)
It’s such an ugly word anyway, why not be more creative with your language? This article very accurately describes why you can’t throw around a word like rape in your everyday language.
Ignorance exists and it is a problem, but it is not anything that cannot be solved. Consciously avoiding use of this word and similar words will make everyone around you far more comfortable, and will clean up your vocabulary for future conversations. Am I guilty of using words that I probably shouldn't? Have I called a song "gay" or a person “retarded”? Yes, I have done both of these in the past, but have not done either in years because it is offensive and uncalled for.
We can all respect each other more, and quit using the word "rape" in casual settings.
