I thought you would stay

Things were wonderful for us in the beginning. From lunch dates to staying at home and watching movies, I did not want things to changed. I was happy with us. You made me feel brand new. You inspired me to work hard and to get through spring semester. You healed my cuts from my past relationships. You were my part of my circle. I depended on you and you were someone I trusted. We would talk every single day and when we didn't, it would feel weird. I was beginning to open up my heart to you after everything I have been through. I cared about you. I focused on you more than I did myself. I wanted what was best for you. I supported you and was positive with the decisions you had to make with your career. We talked about all the fun things we wanted to do and what we wanted in life.

Unfortunately, you got a new job and had to move four hours away. For a few weeks after we moved, we tried to juggle this whole "long distance dating-relationship". It was good for awhile, and then things start to change for the worse. I must admit that I was part of the reason why things changed, but it was not just me. It was you as well. We though we could juggle everything together while living four hours away from each other. The world was big, but we thought we were bigger. Eventually the distance between us would soon separate us. Miscommunication and not listening to each other was the start of the death of our relationship.

In relationships things changed and that's why they require hard work. You just can't give up on the relationship and that person for one thing they did. We all mess up in life. We make mistakes, and that's life. You can't expect someone not to make a mistake in a relationship. You have to remind yourself that no one is perfect and people cannot read your mind. There has to be balance in relationships. There will be pros and cons in relationships and you have to decide if it's worth it to dedicate your time in effort into that relationship. When you start putting less effort, it starts to fade away. A relationship is a two way street and this applies to any kind of relationship whether it is with friends or family. Relationships involve effort from both sides. It just cannot be one person that steadies the relationship, but it needs both people for it to thrive. If one person doesn't like it when their partner does something, listen to them, but at the same time it takes time for them to change their habits. One person can only do so much. Some people are like that. They keep their relationship going for as long as possible. They try their best to keep in contact with that person in those "long distance dating-relationships". Eventually that one person will say "I can't do this, I'm done". Soon the blame will fall on the other person. They will wonder what they did wrong and what they could've changed. At that point, it's too late to find out and you are left wondering.

That's when relationships go astray. I do not think relationships can permanently end, but on life support.

Sadly, our relationship was on life support and you decided to pull the plug. All this time I had blamed myself for everything I did wrong. I soon realized you were just as much to blame for. You let me go. At first I was heart broken for a good month, but after tearful nights and wondering how to get you back, I pulled myself together. I realized that I did not need you or anyone. I had myself and people that decided to stick around through thick and thin unlike you. You gave up on us easily. Don't get me wrong, I still miss you and think about you constantly, but I am learning to live without you. Now instead of lighting up when you text me or call me, I light up when I see where my future is going. I have finally accepted the changes in my life that doesn't involve you. I guess that is what happens when you decide to let go of a good girl. I start to realize that you lost the prize you once had. I don't miss the way you swoon me, because I know you are missing my inner and outer beauty, the effort and care I put towards you, the massages I gave you, my good ass cooking skills and my time.

Now I say thank you! Thank you for changing me. Thank you for breaking my heart, so that way I can change for the better. Thank you for making me a bad ass chick that has a heart that is stronger than before. Thank you for reminding me that actions will always mean more than words. You lost a good one sweetie.

I'm sorry for your lost....