Growing up is scary. We think we are prepared for it, but then in a blink of an eye, it happens. I had an epiphany the other day while driving on campus: Wow, I have been on my own for a year now. I'm halfway through my first semester of my second year of college, and sometimes I miss those good old days.
The moment I realized I grew up, I felt lost and I missed my family. In the heat of it all, we hated having our parents hover over us, making sure we made our beds in the morning, insisting we put our laundry away after it was folded, or making us ask them if we could go to the movies with our friends on a Friday night. Now, looking at the laundry spilling out of my laundry basket and my bed looking like I just got out of it, I realize I am that scary human we call an adult. I have to make my own decisions, and let me tell you, having to decide whether or not I have time to grab a coffee in between my classes is hard enough.
All our lives we have looked forward to the moment when we would be on our own, not answering to anyone. Now, I can nap whenever I want and stay out as late as I want, and I don't have to tell anyone where I am going when I reach for my car keys. Sure, it's exciting to have all this new responsibility, but that doesn't mean that for a second that I don't miss relying on my parents to check up on me every so often. There are times that I still have to call my dad just to ask what the light means on my dashboard that just lit up, or my mom to make sure I can wash my grey towels with my white ones. The saying, "You don't know what you have until it's gone," has been nothing but true to me since I moved out of my house a little over a year ago. Fighting with my sister over clothes or teasing my little brother about his girlfriends (excuse me, girl-space-friends) are no longer everyday occurrences -- and I often miss them.
Although I sometimes crave the old days, this new time in my life is nothing short of exciting. As I am about to enter my twenties, I am happy for what living on my own has taught me. I have learned that it is okay to have days when I feel lost and just need to hear my parents' voices, but I also know I am completely capable of taking care of myself and making decisions that will positively affect my life -- and for that, I am thankful.
