“We accept the love we think we deserve.”
You’ve probably seen this quote posted on Twitter, Pinterest, or Tumblr. Maybe someone you know has it tattooed on their arm, maybe you’ve fleetingly skimmed it in some article you read long ago. This quote originated from a novel written by Stephen Chbosky entitled "The Perks of Being a Wallflower." You may have seen this book-turned-movie a couple years back. This line seems to be one of those quotes that earned its fame solely because it resonated with a whole bunch of people and made everyone really think.
In moments of reflection, I have come to the conclusion that at different times of my life I have been willing to accept different kinds of love. It is clear to me that in the past I have oftentimes let other people decide how much and what kind of love I deserve. I have passively accepted treatment that is for sure less than what I should be given, solely because I was afraid of standing up for what I was worth. I was afraid of actually believing that I might deserve real, forgiving, and unconditional love.
What is shocking to me is how many times we feel like human love has the capacity to be the epitome of love. We look to our family, friends, boyfriends and girlfriends, desperately seeking validation about how much we are worth. How much we should be loved. Just how accepted we really are. In actuality, there are only two factors in the equation that should be telling you anything about what you should be receiving: YOU and The Lord.
We have the capacity to choose how much we deserve. We have the capacity to determine our value and we get to have a say about what is and isn’t okay. You have to be completely confident in who you are, what you believe in, and what your aspirations are in order to make sure that you are letting people love you who are going to do it right. If you don’t value your worth enough, then you will accept treatment and love that is mediocre when there is so much more that someone could offer you. When you realize that every single part of you was hand picked by Jesus, you will finally know what you deserve. You will accept love that is only good enough for a masterpiece created by The Lord and you will give love to others that is just as fulfilling.
Not only do our opinions of ourselves tell us what we can accept from other people, but these opinions also play a role in how much of Christ’s love we feel like we can truly take to heart. It is a beautiful thing to recognize that we deserve The Lord's unconditional, all-consuming, all-conquering love. We will never truly be able to comprehend how much Jesus loves us, but when we even attempt to understand the magnitude of His love for us, it helps us know how valuable we really are.
I challenge each of you to pursue the kind of love that you truly deserve. Believe that you are valuable enough, worth enough, and more than good enough to be loved in true, honest, uplifting ways. Know in your heart what you should be receiving, and never settle for anything that is even remotely less than that. We accept the love we think we deserve, and that should be a whole lot of love, my friends.
