Lifeguards Have Become Therapists
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Friendships

I Guess Lifeguards Are Therapists, Too

When did I become Dr. Phil?

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I Guess Lifeguards Are Therapists, Too

Being a lifeguard since I was fourteen, I have met a lot of people. Some have been real all-stars—I consider myself to be really close with them and enjoy their company while I am stuck in my chair for several hours at a time. I consider these people to be great friends who are great conversationalists and people that I have learned to trust.

I have come to know some remarkable people.

Sometimes, I meet people who lay their entire life story on me within an hour of swimming.

Don't get me wrong, I love listening and helping those that I can—even with my lack of life experience. I don't overstep my bounds, I only seek to help. But some people lay on a decade or more's worth of issues that I can't even fathom or begin to piece together. Plus, I don't even know these people!

Recently, I had an eleven-year-old child (who could honestly pass for seven years old) come up to me and randomly start telling me that his father lets his fifteen-year-old brother smoke weed in the house and that he and his brother are spoiled with Louis Vuitton and Gucci things. After I left, he also asked another lifeguard if she was drinking Hennessy from her water bottle. Not to mention that this child was there without adult supervision. At this point, I honestly didn't know what to think. Part of me wants to get his name and talk to someone to see if I should report the drug use, but the other part realizes that he could be making things up for attention. He was early middle-school-age—the prime age for elaborate lies. And he didn't tell me that he was a victim of child abuse, so there wasn't much I could do.

Another example: Years ago, a woman told me that she was on her eighth child and she was expecting a huge deductible and benefit check to come in. All I asked her was "How are you today?"

I've had groups of teenage girls come in as friends and become enemies in the span of two hours. If I notice that there's bullying occurring, I remove the people that seem to be the bullies. Half of the comments made are inappropriate, mean, and could be hurtful to anyone in the room. I kicked out a girl's friends once and she yelled at me for it! She got out and went with them.

Another time, I was in the middle of a marriage dispute that involved the stepfather almost drowning a child. The child refused to get back in the water because she was afraid. In all honestly, it really looked like he was trying to drown her. But when the chid's mom came up to talk to her (she was sitting by my chair), she told the girl to apologize to her stepdad for accusing him of drowning her. I was shocked, but stayed quiet. Then I heard the parents arguing. This made me mad, so I intervened, offering for them to argue outside while I watched their kids. They were starting a scene, after all. They proceeded to get mad, explain themselves angrily, and take their kids with them as they left. It was like I did something wrong in trying to diffuse a situation.

These are just highlights from a mountain of other stories that I have.

A very common theme is the act of dragging me into issues to mediate. While lifeguards are meant to keep people safe, I have also become a referee—and even a therapist.

I've given more advice to strangers while working than I ever have to my friends. Once, a girl who didn't know whether to break up with her boyfriend. Somehow, I persuaded her to stick it out. (Her reasoning was all theoretical. She found out that all the things she heard were lies, anyhow.)

I don't have a Ph.D. I'm unbiased, yes, but people shouldn't be such open books. I understand wanting to make conversation and talk to somebody, but you should never start with the heavy stuff—especially if you are talking to strangers.

I'll never understand, and I never will. But I'll always gladly listen and help to the best of my ability. Just PLEASE don't ask me to be a witness for your wedding (you'd think I was kidding, but this actually happened to a friend of mine), ask me for money (also has happened), or tell me about your divorce as you try to ask me out.

Just refrain. Please.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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