Sometimes, when you've never been in a serious relationship it can feel like you're going to be single forever. Like down the road – then you're 60 and it's just you and your 15 dogs, single. But I think there is a common misconception when it comes to loving someone else. The most important factor of being able to love someone else is loving yourself first. I think that this is something that is often overlooked and we just end up wondering why we haven't found our person yet;, but it's because we haven't taken the time to find ourselves.
When you're 14 or 15, and just beginning high school, I feel like being single isn't really something that is on our minds a lot; but then you blink and you're 20 years old and still single. It may seem childish when you first think about it, but sometimes it's hard to look around at all of your friends, or your roommates, who are in relationships when you're not, and/or have never been in one. I'm sure I'm not the only one who takes a break and just thinks, "I wish that was me once in a while." But listen up because it's OK. If you're not in a relationship, right now, that just means you might not be ready to love someone else yet.
I think the big question we should all be asking ourselves is, "How can I love myself?" It seems like a very intimidating question because it is. But, if we just took the time to think about what makes us happy, what makes us who we are, we would learn a little bit about loving ourselves.
One thing everyone should try to do from now on is to accept compliments. I know this might sound strange, but have you ever just walked by someone, or been with one of your friends and they told you, "You look so beautiful today!" I know we all do it; we say thank you and smile but in the inside we don't believe them. Now, let's think about this for a second.
Why would one of your best friends or especially a stranger say something so nice to you and just not mean it. They mean it! So take the compliment, and believe them wholeheartedly. Because you are beautiful, you are strong and you are a one of a kind person. It's time to start believing in ourselves.
Something that I've learned this year is how important it is to discover yourself. You're 20 years old, for goodness sake -- this is the best time to discover who you are and what makes you, you! Find what makes you happy, what makes you laugh, cry, and smile! Whether that be blogging, spending time with friends who love to laugh, or even driving for hours listening to songs from the 2000s (hello 'N' Sync album that's still on my phone).
Find love. Not just love from others, but find love within yourself and what you do. As humans, we love to love! But, that doesn't mean you have to have a relationship to experience that feeling. I know you all have that inner beauty, so search for it and make it show on the outside. My mom is always telling me that emotions show on the outside, and its true. When you are proud of who you are, confident in yourself and full of love and joy, it's something that others can easily see.
Take this time in your life to do what makes you happy. Spend time with your friends, family and your dog (of course). Surround yourself with those people who care about you, who make you want to rip your hair out sometimes, but you love anyways. Take crazy trips, eat ice cream every night, be weird, be different, because that feeling of love, joy and happiness will make you love every part of who you are.
Fall in love with your flaws. Now, this is something I am still working on each and every day; but it is possible. Love the way you look, love the way you do certain things, the way you talk, dress and act. Once you are able to accept your flaws, it is going to be so much easier to see how incredible you really are. We are human, no one is perfect and that's exactly how it should be. So, its okay to have flaws because that is what makes you different than everyone else sitting around you. Let's face it, being normal is boring anyways.
I've come to the conclusion that being single is the best time to discover what exactly makes you, you. Learn about yourself and love every crazy, beautiful, annoying thing that describes you to a T. Love your quirks, and love your flaws because that is what makes you the incredibly unique person that you are. You might not find that person, right now, but that's OK. Look forward to that day when someone else treats you like the most important person in the world. But, for now, it's time to start loving yourself.
