What once was new must become old.
It must, because time moves forward and the earth spins 'round.
We were all new once.
New to the world, new to our parents, new to our family...
New when we made friends,
New when we started school,
When we got that job.
But what happens when we are not "new" anymore?
When you have established relationships and you no longer feel excited,
When you look at the other person and they are still new to you...
Everyday they are new.
You treat them as if tomorrow is not abruptly approaching and as if yesterday was made of gold.
In your eyes they are seasoned with everything good in the world, your memories are embedded into them, and you cannot wait to make more.
And then they look at you.
They look at you and you see the reflection of yourself in their eyes and it is old.
They view you as seasoned, just as you view them, but it seems you have already passed in their eyes.
You have already had your memories and you have already done what you needed to do in their life and now you are sort of just there.
Old...
So many new exciting things are in their life now, just like when you were new and exciting.
But now you are old.
You feel kicked to the side like an old toy,
Like the crust on a pb & j sandwich that everyone wants cut off.
Maybe you are being too sensitive.
Maybe you just need to accept that you are not new any longer.
You are not number one.
You are not their go-to when they have a free day.
You are no longer the destination.
The whole "being too sensitive " thing will always be in the back of your mind, only because in your heart of hearts, you do not want it to be their fault.
You do not want to bring it to their attention.
You do not want to talk about it because it will then be too real.
The thing is, you still love them and cherish them just the same, and that love for them is not going anywhere.
That is what makes it difficult.
Still loving them...
But that is what also makes it easy.
Some of us will go through a time in our lives where we are a constant variable for someone and we will be there for so long that it becomes our second nature to be there, not only for us, but for the other person in the relationship.
Whether it be a romantic relationship or a friendship, we will have to make the choice whether or not we want to bring our feelings of lonesomeness to light, or just let or feelings rot away until the relationship becomes something else.
Follow your soul, you will know exactly what to do.
Speak your mind dear friends, stay light.
