No one really "dates" anymore. Have you ever noticed that? Over the last ten years, I feel like long-term dating and monogamy are now replaced with the new short casual sexual culture surrounding college campuses.
How relationships are formed has changed drastically since my parents started dating back in the 1980s. I think there are several reasons for this. As you probably know, the rise in technology has contributed a lot to this change. With access to almost everything on the internet, pornography is becoming more and more accessible.
In psychological studies time and time again porn has been shown to have numerous consequences. The increase in the viewers of pornography rises each year and the viewers are younger each year. This scary phenomenon has contributed to the hookup culture and attitudes men and women had towards sex.
Guy Kelly writes from an article "The Scary Effects of Pornography," "Studies have confirmed that the dopamine increase resulting from porn potentially means users require a greater and greater sensation from real sex in order to match what they can so easily access."
Parents don't talk to their children about sex, they assume all the information their children need is given to them at school. With the increase of women in the household working teenagers are being monitored less, and having sex younger than years before.
Not to mention these hookup relationships are becoming easier and easier to find. With apps like Tinder, Snapchat, and Facebook messenger, people can easily chat with people they are interested in. I cannot tell you how many times guys have messaged me on Instagram or Facebook in attempts to flirt with me. But there is something uncomfortable and unsettling about forming a relationship with someone online.
Even if a student is not sexually active they cannot escape this culture. College is labeled as a time when freedom is more accessible than it ever has been.
With the rise in the hookup culture relationships are taking an unhealthy turn. According to Lisa Wade, "Overall, about one in three students say that their intimate relationships have been "traumatic" or "very difficult to handle." Students feel as though their relationships are "traumatic" because sexual coercion and manipulation is becoming more and more common, rather than relationships focused on mutual love and quality time spent together.
Men and women are having casual sex because they are expected to not necessarily because they always want to. I know so many of my friends who feel pressured into having sex in relationships when they don't want to. (Read more of Lisa's thoughts by clicking here).
Another terrifying side effect is the number of sexual assaults on campus is rising and continues to do so with the persistence of these new cultural ideals.
Not everyone wants to be a part of the hookup culture, but it certainly has become the norm. I don't know about you, but I want to get to know people face-to-face, go on long walks, and awkward first dates.