To the girl who wants a career before a family:
I hear ya. I do, too.
It's not that I'm against being with someone, buying a nice house with a few little ones running around and maybe a dog or two, but when I think about my life, when I picture my future, I see myself becoming someone invested in their career, traveling the world, doing what I love to do, and living life to the fullest. Nowhere in that dream does it involve a family.
It's odd to be a hopeless romantic and not dream of marrying or having children. I'm convinced that being a hopeless romantic helps me with my writing, which will ultimately be my career. Creating fantasies of romance is much more appealing to me that making it happen in my own life.
So, to the girl who also dreams of a career before (or instead of) a family, you are not alone.
There are millions of us out there, breaking the cycle of growing up to find someone to make us happy. We are making ourselves happy by doing what we love to do. And hey, if a family is what makes you happy or you manage to have both a successful career and a family (without having to sacrifice a lot for either), then kudos to you.
We career-driven ladies have made other plans. Plans to stand out among the crowd of women walking down the aisle of both a church and the baby section. Plans to dream as big as we possibly can. Plans to make a name for ourselves, earning respect from everyone along the way. Plans to break the barriers and do the unexpected.
Now, some dream of having a family and that's all they want. Having a career won't be a fulfilling as creating life and raising it. Different opinions, different people, different lives. It's all okay! It should be okay. Who am I to say one is better than the other?
However, I know I get a lot of heat from people telling me to find a nice man and settle down, or that when I least expect it, I'll meet someone. What if I don't necessarily want to meet someone? What if I move to a new country for ME and MY CAREER and not for anything else? It's exhausting having to listen to people telling me that I don't know what I'm talking about because I still haven't met someone worth changing my dreams for.
For those ladies who want to change the world and do something extraordinary, you already know that there will be people challenging your ideals and yours dreams, telling you that you need to wait until the right person comes along. I'm saying screw that! Don't wait for anyone! You don't need to have someone by your side to have done something with your life. You just need to aim for the stars, and hopefully a little farther.
I decided early on what I wanted, and that was a career. Some did, too. And others decide later on. Whenever it happens, that decision is a powerful one because I believe it's you taking control of your life and doing something not everyone does. It's breaking the cycle. It's dreaming bigger. It's earning respect from others for being so bold. It's breaking the barrier and doing the unexpected.
And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.
