As I sit here, looking up job ads, I can't help but question if I truly know what I'm doing. I'm graduating college in 90 days, which is also a semester earlier than I am supposed to. I wonder if I made the right decision by always taking full class loads and summer courses. I wonder if skipping out on some of the fun college events will be worth it come December when I walk across that stage. Ever since I was in high school I had always been told that college would be the best years of your life. Well, that is partly true; college contains some of the most fun moments and memories that I have ever had. I don't regret any of it because those decisions and experiences made me who I am today. They shaped me into the person I was supposed to end up as. So I'm pretty sure you're questioning why as though I wanted to graduate early; well you aren't the only one who has given me a weird look and questioned my decision.
I've always envisioned myself working in the city and living out my dream; so I guess once I started to see that dream getting closer and closer, I rushed it. While I don't regret doing this because I am beyond sick of pointless schoolwork, I know I'll miss the excuse of being a student. I'm being taunted every day of my dream that is right in front of me and how close I actually am to it. I don't spend my nights going out with my friends until the early hours of the morning every single night of the weekend. I don't stay up late doing God knows what.
It's weird because I wake up at 6 a.m. every morning to go to work, I get off late and either head to dinner and drinks with a friend or home to lay down and relax. When I was in my college prime, I would jump at any chance to go out and do something. Now, it seems as though this getting older thing is really setting in. I'm more conscious about how I spend my money and time. I think harder about the decisions I make and what the outcome will be and if it's worth it. I think about all of the things I have to do in the days to come and what I should be starting to accomplish now. It's ironic though because I want to grow up so bad. Most people my age are doing anything and everything to avoid being in the place that I am.
I don't regret rushing this though because I'm excited to grow up. I might not get what I want or things might not go my way, but that's the funny thing about growing up, you just have to learn to be OK with the unknown. Be prepared to handle what life throws your way and just roll with the punches. Growing up is a funny thing and we all need to be able to laugh at ourselves.
