Have you ever wondered what doctors and dentists were like before they got their lives together? What they were like when they were dazed and confused undergrads much like ourselves, with the added label of "pre-med?" In today’s collegiate world, being “pre-med” can mean several things, but I have found there to be four distinct types of these people.
1. The “I’m More Worldly Than You” Pre-Med
These are the ones who major in things like professional bike riding or being a celebrity chef. They fill their schedules with the required science as well as courses like "Alternative Sewing" or "CPR for animals." These people are totally random, and they aren't going to let you forget about it. They'll go on forever talking about their days of not only solving chemical equations, but also writing fiction and doing competitive yoga, all while volunteering at some random alpaca farm.
2. The Excessively Self-Absorbed Pre-Med
These are the pre-meds who love talking about how they are pre-med more than actually being pre-med. It’s like these ones wake up every morning, determined to be the center of attention at all times by complaining constantly so that everyone else can feel as stressed out as they're pretending to be. I'll admit, I am guilty of being a stressed out mess that loves talking about being a stressed out mess.That's bad enough, but these people take it to a whole new level. I can understand that all the science courses that fill their schedules with labs and homework can leave one in a constant state of delirium. But also, it kinda just seems like an excuse to have an obnoxious ego-complex.
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3. The Self-Loathing Pre-Med
I guess it’s kind of a thing that everyone sort of hates pre-meds. Most pre-meds don’t even like pre-meds. That is who this category is made for: the ones that hate the pre-med label and lifestyle. I think that a lot of the time it is because they don't want to be stereotyped. I admit that sometimes I avoid telling people that I want to be a doctor of some sort one day so I can avoid that doubtful look of the other person thinking "suuuuuure you are." Or perhaps the self-loathing comes from the constant anxiety and the fear of never getting to professionally diagnose someone with a disorder that you, yourself, now suffer from due to your hard as hell classes.
4. The Closet Pre-Med
These are the people you love for every reason you hate the "excessively self-absorbed pre-med." They are the ones that you aren't sure are pre-med. They are always calm, cool, and collected, and so one would think that they have some easy major and kind of just stumbled in your science classes because they were just bored with their easy schedule. These are the ones that you ask how they did on their exams, thinking that you'll get to brag about doing better, but it turns out they got a 100%. These elusive kinds of pre-meds don't even flaunt their label, and yet they still do it better than you. They get by just doing their own original and fiercely independent thing without making a big deal about wanting to save lives and stuff. You should love them for this but unusually competitive feelings arise, and all of the sudden these people are your enemy.
