We humans have rights—an abundance of them. The Declaration of Independence begins by affirming that everyone is entitled to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Through the Bill of Rights, the Constitution allows people the freedom of religion, freedom of speech, freedom of the press, the right to bear arms, the right to a fair trial, the right to vote, and the right to be treated equally under the law, among others. Society today is immensely concerned with preserving those rights, and even increasing them. Human rights and equality have become a rallying cry, a cause for concern and debate.
However, I think we’re forgetting a rather important right. It is one of the most basic human rights, one that everyone is entitled to. It is the right to kindness. Everyone deserves to be treated with basic human kindness; we all know this. Starting in kindergarten, we raise children by the Golden Rule: do unto others as you would have them do unto you. If you wouldn’t like it, don’t do it to someone else. At what point do we begin to forget the Golden Rule? Yet no matter how much we forget to follow the Golden Rule, we always demand that others around us follow it and treat us accordingly.
Perhaps we forget as a matter of convenience. Treating others with the basic kindness they deserve is rarely easy. It requires time, effort, and on occasion, a little discomfort on our parts. It requires far less time and effort to let a door shut in someone’s face rather than stand and hold it for them. It is far more comfortable to remain in our own world than to reach out to another person’s with a word of kindness or an act of service.
Perhaps we forget the definition of “human”. According to the New Oxford American Dictionary, a human is “a human being, especially a person as distinguished from an animal”. It’s pretty clear who’s a human and who isn’t, yet sometimes we try and redefine the word to fit the people we want it to. We cut out the people who annoy us, the people who are “different” from us, and the people we don’t like— even if we don’t deem them inhuman, we decide they aren’t worth our kindness. If kindness is a human right, and I undoubtedly argue that it is, then every human is entitled to it, no matter how we feel about them. Treating others with the kindness they deserve can be difficult at times. Perhaps they have slighted us in some way, some unforgivable way. Perhaps they irritate us with their mannerisms and habits that we just can’t stand. Perhaps they are simply too unusual. Perhaps their beliefs are simply too wrong. None of those are good reasons for withholding from someone the basic right of human kindness. While we do not have to like everyone, we do have to treat everyone with kindness and respect.
Perhaps we forget how it feels. No one likes to be treated poorly. Yet we still feel that it is okay to treat others poorly. Maybe we don’t outright bully them, call them names, or slander them to their faces. To neglect someone, ignore them, or talk about them behind their back—that’s still breaking the Golden Rule. Being neglected and ignored hurts too, and eventually, the cruel words said in secret will make their way to the object of the discussion. Trust me, I’ve been on both ends—the one withholding kindness from someone and the one being bullied, ignored, or discussed unawares. To treat anyone in a way that doesn’t hold to the Golden Rule does hurt the victim, even if we choose to bully them behind closed doors, thinking it isn’t wrong if they can’t hear it.
Perhaps we don’t realize forgetting hurts us, too. Treating others unkindly not only hurts those we treat poorly; it also hurts us. We all want kindness, and withholding it from others makes us bitter. It causes something within us to start to shrivel and dry up; it causes our hearts to harden, little by little. People notice when someone consistently treats others poorly; no one wants to be around someone like that. Therefore we start to lose friends, the people who show us kindness.
Perhaps we can—and should—remember the right to kindness. Treating people kindly is not as difficult as it may sound. While it may take an effort to treat those we dislike kindly, it is the right thing to do—and it gradually grows easier the more we make it an intentional habit. Eventually, treating others kindly, including those who are difficult to show kindness to, becomes natural. Doing the right thing always pays off in the end—for the person showing kindness and the person receiving it.
Perhaps we should be kind.
