So when we hold things in, we can often build things up until the point that it all comes out at once, on people that usually don't deserve it. We wait until we can't hold it in anymore. We become a pop bottle that has been shaken and isn't opened slowly to let the carbonation without the pop overflowing,. We explode.

People often will not talk about their feelings or what they're going through. Instead, we bury it deep, into our bellies where we hold onto it like it's some kind of vomit we don't want to show. But when it gets to the point where we can't hold it back anymore... We become a two-liter with a whole roll of Mentos dropped inside that morphs into an uncontrollable fountain of fizz.

But why do we do this?

Why continue doing it even knowing that we could very well say or do things that will ultimately hurt others? Hurt the people we love and care for dearly?

Why do we hide ourselves? Why do we feel the need to hide our feelings, our inner selves, from everybody? Even the people we love?

I can't point fingers or get angry about how others do this, because I do the exact same thing. I'll hold it in, cry about it later, rage about it in my diary... But I won't really talk to other people about how I feel. I'd rather find other ways to let out my emotions than talk about them with someone. I'd rather pretend everything is okay, even when I'm sitting in that black hole of depression or anxiety or whatever else is going through my head and body.

I think that people doing this is how many people end up deciding to self-harm to get away from their emotions. It becomes an escape from their reality, a place that they can go to that not many other people around them may understand. It lets them float away from the problems in their minds and body.

But in the long-run, why do we do that? Society? Culture? Is it how we're raised? Is it a certain mindset?

Does everybody do this?

I know a few people who are very open and honest about how they feel, but I think the majority of the people I know try to hide most of their feelings so they can pretend that everything is okay.

In my opinion, it comes down to a combination of things. Movies, and society. In a lot of movies, the man or woman, or both even, will hold back on what they're feeling until it gets to the point of being 'unbearable'. Sometimes it's about their love and sometimes it's about anger or other emotions. But they all show that holding it in until that person explodes is okay. It is portrayed in T.V. shows and movies; kids and adults alike watch it basically their whole lives, so people believe that it's okay to do too.

Also, our society used to be that we kept everything as secret as we could. No one needed to know what the family was going through or needed to have help with those problems. Way back in the pioneer time and earlier, women were ignored and had the responsibilities of taking care of the house and children without worrying about other things. So they were expected to be quiet about problems unless it was something that would affect everyone as whole in the household.

Then everything goes on to that it's totally okay to open up to your partner and being totally independent on them. But what about while you're growing up? Shouldn't it be seen as okay to open up and talk about everything with our parents or siblings even? We need more than just partners to be able to talk to and open up to about our feelings when we're 11 or 14 years old. I know that most times kids don't want to talk to their parents, but I also feel that most of the time kids feel like they can't because their parents don't provide them with the comfort necessary for them to be able to open up. Or maybe they think that their parents already have enough on their plates and so they can take care of everything about what was going on with them by themselves.

I'm not saying that exploding is entirely bad... I'm just saying that maybe we should be more open with each other, letting each other know more often how we feel or maybe asking for support as we go through tough situations in our lives. We all have them. But exploding uncontrollably, where you're to the point where you can't even remember what you said after, or what you did, that's the point where you know you need to find a better way to handle your emotions. You don't want to hurt the people you're close to.

So I'm saying that we find the way to slowly let out our emotions before they end up exploding all over the place, and on the wrong people.