I’ve always been a people pleaser, that’s just who I am. I like to be liked, and I’m not afraid to admit it. I think a lot of people think that’s a negative quality, but I disagree. I think everyone likes to be liked whether they want to admit it or not. You can say “I don’t care what people think of me,” but at the end of the day, it’s nearly impossible to not care completely. Everyone has a reputation, and everyone cares. All of this being said, it’s okay to care, but it’s not okay to let people walk all over you. This is a lesson that I’ve recently learned. It’s okay to put yourself first.
Putting yourself first is not selfish, it’s important and essential for you to grow as a person. If you spend your entire life doing what everyone else wants you to do, you will never have any time to do what you want to do. You can’t live your life in the footsteps of other people, you need to create your own path.
When I finally made the decision to put myself first, I realized how much I was holding myself back from doing things for other people. I wasn’t used to letting myself have the freedom to make decisions based on my opinion and my opinion alone. It was a liberating feeling, and I encourage every person to make the decision to put themselves first.
Putting yourself ahead of other people doesn’t make you a bad person. It doesn’t mean that you can never agree to go out with your friends or make compromises for them, it just means that you are able to realize and acknowledge when enough is enough, and have the courage to stick up for yourself and look out for yourself when necessary.
If you need to take a day off of work because you’re extremely overwhelmed, do it. If you’re bombarded with homework from classes and your friends are encouraging you to go out, it’s okay to say no and stay in, to finish your work. It’s also okay to take a break and go out. My point is, you need to make decisions based on how you’re feeling and not how other people feel. You can’t spend your entire life worrying about what other people think because it will drive you absolutely insane and you’ll end up miserable because you’ll never do anything for yourself.
Don’t get me wrong, I love doing things for other people. I love spending time with my friends and family whenever I can. I’m always willing to help when anyone needs advice or just wants someone to hang out with and get their mind off of whatever it is they’re going through. I tend to feel bad when someone asks me to do something and I don’t want to. Even if I want to say no, I usually don’t, because I care about how they feel, and I don’t want to let anyone down. I think that is just a part of my personality, but I’m slowly but surely learning that I can’t spread myself too thin. I don’t always have to say yes to everything just to please people. I can make decisions based on how I feel. It’s not selfish, it’s necessary.
Learn to put yourself first and your life will change for the better.
