To the one who took a piece of me when they left,

I never thought I would be here. I never thought I would know what it was like to lose you. I never thought I would have to call my best friend crying because you decided to leave. Yet, here I am.

I was so vulnerable with you. I let you in to the deepest parts of my thoughts and I said things to you that I have never said out loud before. I did all of these things because I thought that you were going to be around for the long run. I thought it was going to be you and I against the world, but I guess I was wrong.

We had so many things planned. We were going to explore the East Coast together, we were going to make the most our young lives. It was supposed to be you and me until the end. You were the only constant that I had in my life and I still don't know what to do without you. I just feel so lost all the time.

You took a piece of me when you left and I don't know when I'm going to be able to replace that piece. You took my trustworthiness, you took the part of me that looked for the best in people. I'm a different person since you left and I still haven't decided how I feel about that. I'm more guarded now so I don't get hurt as easily, but I also don't have as many meaningful relationships. I can't find the courage to open up to anyone because I'm scared they'll get tired of me like you did. If I find something I don't like about someone I end up focusing on it, because it's much easier to keep your walls up when you tell yourself that people aren't worth it.

You also took a little bit of my happiness, or a lot if I'm being honest. However, I'm working on that. I've started wearing my hair how I like it rather than styling it how you used to like it. I've started reading again, even though you always tried to convince me that the movie was better. I might have picked up some bad habits since you left, but I'm also rediscovering the girl I was before I met you. The girl who didn't know what real heartbreak felt like, and I think that I'm coming closer to being more like her with every shaky breath I take.

I'm not going to thank you for hurting me, because If you hadn't I never would have had to search myself to find that girl again. But I'm also not going to blame you. Sometimes people leave, it's inevitable. Maybe you did what you thought was best for you, and I can't blame you for that.

I just want you to know that if you ever feel the need to come back... don't. Things are hard right now, but I know that I'm going to be okay, even if that means being without you.

From,

The girl who is trying to put herself back together.