“That's not racist, that’s maintaining your property value.”
The above quote was my mother’s response to my mention of Donald Trump’s legal battles regarding his alleged bias against African-Americans.
Being the white, heterosexual, attractive, and proud Christian woman that my mother is, I can say with a significant degree of certainty that my mother knows nothing of the pain associated with the discrimination and/or judgement that directly results from characteristics over which people have no control (race, sexual orientation, ethnicity, etc.).
Inflammatory comments like these are, unfortunately, not uncommon. The juxtaposition of the millennial liberalism with the often staunch conservatism of our parents has not gone unnoticed. I rarely have the pleasure of going about my day without suffering the incessant reminders of my mother’s bigotry and racism. The rampant microaggressions and her absolute refusal to accept the reality of her own prejudice is a constant source of frustration.
In the past, I would hold my tongue when she would casually make snide comments as if they were nothing more than harmless jokes. I remained silent because I was afraid of the reaction my responses may elicit. However, these are not harmless jokes. And I no longer hold my tongue.
When we permit others to continue speaking in derogatory ways we effectively contribute to the problem. By refusing to protest in response to these remarks we imply that such statements are acceptable and thus allow this harmful thinking to continue unabated.
I no longer remain silent when my mother’s racism rears its ugly head. I challenge her at every turn. I explain (as calmly and firmly as possible, although I often fail to remain quiet) that such statements are unacceptable because they contribute to the problems faced by marginalized groups. My mother may abhor the thought of lynching African-Americans for no reason other than the color of their skin, and she may view the KKK as a horrific product of the human capacity for hatred, but she nonetheless contributes to the same stereotypes and generalizations that ultimately contribute to systemic problems like institutionalized racism and implicit bias amongst law enforcement agents. Yes, Black Lives Matter is a legitimate movement that seeks to call attention to and resolve the very real issue of implicit bias within law enforcement agencies. It is the use of comments like the ones made by my mother that feed into the idea that “other” people are, for example, more violent, less dependable, less clean, and so forth.
A common argument against the protesting which I am supporting here is that most stereotypes and generalizations are rooted in some level of truth. Regardless of whether this is true or not, stereotyping and/or generalizing in these contexts remains inappropriate. For example, my mother cited (anecdotal) evidence to support her aforementioned claim: she and my father once rented a home to an African-American couple that proceeded to leave the property in complete disarray. I explained that it is only natural to be affected by one’s own experiences, and that we are bound to maintain certain notions about certain people as a result of our experiences, but that we cannot allow these beliefs to affect how we treat others. It is our responsibility to overcome our prejudice and acknowledge that, although some African-Americans are violent, and some Latin Americans are not citizens, and some people abuse welfare, we are absolutely not automatically permitted to assign the characteristics of a few to an entire population.
Racism is real just as sexism is real. However, modern examples of racism and sexism are often less conspicuous than they once were.
Modern day prejudice is often shrouded in tradition, or excused by one’s upbringing. This is nonetheless indefensible. Racism is, and forever will be, unacceptable. It is, therefore, our responsibility to challenge statements like the one mentioned above. It is our responsibility to condemn racist remarks just as it is our responsibility to condemn jokes that make light of rape or mental disability. Flippant disregard for our lack of action does nothing to solve the issues at hand, nor does the acceptance of our infectious apathy and indifference. These actions do nothing but perpetuate and enable that which has plagued marginalized groups for centuries.
Racism will not be stopped by some national campaign or by an impassioned speech. Racism will end when people end it. Racism will end when we end it.
