Recommended for you

Start writing a post

Relationships

Thank You, Next: My Exes And What They Taught Me

My 5 most influential ex-somethings and what I learned from the flawed relationships

Allison Bethmann

Aug 16, 2020

Missouri State University

Thank You, Next: My Exes And What They Taught Me

Scrabble Letters Spelling Thank U Next · Free Stock Photo

I say "ex-somethings" because not all of these relationships were official. Some were in the "talking" stage, others were just a step past friendship. For the sake of keeping this anonymous, I have assigned "nicknames" to each of the guys.

1. The Manipulator

The Manipulator taught me the valuable lesson of how to stand up for myself and my morals.

He would use manipulation tactics to get me to do what he wanted... hence, the name "The Manipulator". After a few weeks, he broke up with me because I was at a wedding, so I couldn't go to a party with him. Now, he is married and is expecting his second kid.

If I could tell him anything, I would tell him that I wish him the best and I hope he has a good life.

2. The Smooth-Talker

The Smooth-Talker taught me how to listen to my instincts.

He knew exactly what to say to get me to like him. He used me to cheat on a girlfriend that I didn't know he had. After I found out, he talked me into not breaking up with him. We kept getting into arguments and he repeatedly told me to kill myself. To top it all off, he eventually ghosted me. Now, he is single and in the Army.

If I could tell him anything, I would tell him that I deserve better and he had no right to treat me like that.

3. The Obsessed One

The obsessed one taught me how to resist a sketchy situation, even when it would be easy to give in.

He was a senior when I was a freshman. He also had an on again, off again girlfriend at the time. I decided that, as a fellow woman, she should know that her boyfriend was texting me about "how much he wanted to be with me". He then threatened to kill himself because she had broken up with him. Within the next year, they got back together and got engaged as he left for the Marines. He continued to try to text me and confess feelings for me. His then-fiancee called everything off and sent his ring back. He is now still in the Marines and about to get deployed to Japan in September.

If I could tell him anything, I would tell him that he needs to move on from both of us and just live his life.

4. The Abuser

The abuser taught me how to recognize abuse.

He was my best friend for over a year, but things started to change a bit. We hung out literally every day and things started feeling like more than a friendship. Some of the various abusive red flags were: choking me until I almost passed out, chasing me with a taser, threatening me with a switchblade, forcibly leaving hickeys on my neck and chest, as well as painfully biting my neck. The really screwed up part was that, as soon as he apologized, I went back. He is currently still with his girlfriend of two years that he left me for.

If I could tell him anything, I would tell him that he's a piece of shit and he has caused permanent emotional damage. Even when people I care about try to hug me or kiss me, I mentally freak out.

5. The Best Friend

The Best Friend taught me how to be happy again.

He was a bit jealous during our relationship. We were just a pair of best friends that decided to try dating, but it changed the whole dynamic. We agreed that, in order to preserve our friendship, we need to peacefully break up. It still sucked, but our friendship was too important to risk in a forced relationship. Now, we are still best friends and I plan to see him any time I go home on college breaks.

If I could tell him anything, I would tell him that I miss him and I can't wait to see him again.

Report this Content

This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Entertainment

25 Beatles Lyrics: Your Go-To Guide for Every Situation

The Best Lines from the Fab Four

SUNY Binghamton

48238

Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less

best beatles lyrics

Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Smith College

112753

college students waiting in a long line in the hallway

StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

waitlisted

Recommended for you

Thank You, Next: My Exes And What They Taught Me

My 5 most influential ex-somethings and what I learned from the flawed relationships

1. The Manipulator

2. The Smooth-Talker

3. The Obsessed One

4. The Abuser

5. The Best Friend

Subscribe to our Newsletter

The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

Trending Topics

Top Creators

Trending Stories

Best of Relationships

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments

Subscribe to our
Newsletter