You've been around me for awhile now, which means you've seen the good, the bad and the ugly. Honestly, I think that in many ways you know me better than I know myself, or at least are more willing to recognize what I need more than I'm willing to admit. You are aware of my ongoing struggles with anxiety, and yet, you remain unfazed. You seem to know what to say, what I need and how to pull me out of my intense thought spirals. I cannot thank you enough.
I know we communicate every day and that I already emit far too many words on a regular basis. I've expressed to you before how grateful I am that you take care of me in my anxiousness, but I just wanted to take this time to articulate my appreciation for all that you do for me in my times of stress, fear and worry.
Thank you for standing by me through every stressful moment.
Not a single panic attack nor mental breakdown seems to rattle you in the slightest. You choose from your arsenal the perfect combination of words to combat whatever worry or fear I'm facing at a given moment. As someone who clearly has a difficult time remaining cool, calm and collected in the face of pretty much anything, I have no ability to understand how you do so, but I appreciate it beyond what I can explain.
Thank you for reminding me to breathe.
Dating all the way back to practically the very beginning of our relationship, you've employed a particular breathing exercise for when I begin to hyperventilate and am unable to get my words out. This routine has never once failed in helping to calm me down physically, which allows me to truly process what's going on inside my head, mentally and emotionally.
Thank you for reassuring me.
I know I ask the same questions over and over again; I know that it must appear as though I cannot trust anyone or anything; I know I can be very irrational. Thank you for knowing that it's not you. It is my anxiety and me. You humor me by providing the same responses time and time again, no matter how tired you must be of doing so. Thank you for understanding that such consistency and little reminders do wonders.
Thank you for being patient and for not giving up on me.
It can be difficult for people who do not struggle with anxiety to understand those of us who do obsess and fret over every little thing. It can be challenging to understand an emotional and mental reality that is not your own, yet you never consider giving up. Your patience with me surpasses what I deserve, and I'm truly baffled by how you can put up with me on the days when I can't even handle myself.
Thank you for taking care of me.
You make me laugh when all I feel like doing is crying. You remind me that the world is, in fact, not all black and white when I anxiously or stubbornly refuse to see it as such. You wrap me up in your fantastic hugs, listen to every single word of my rants and cries and take the time to respond to my explosions of text messages when I'm freaking out.
Thank you for loving me when I find it difficult to love myself.
While I'm certainly not proud of it, I can work myself into ridiculous levels of self-deprecation in my anxiety. Not only are you strictly intolerant of me speaking such things into existence, but you actively combat this horrible tendency of mine with words of love and affirmation.Thank you for pointing me to God in my times of worry. You consistently remind me to live loved by Him and that I am so loved by you and by everyone in my life who cares for me.
I love you.
Molly
