I have been struggling with anixety and depression since I was in seventh grade, and I never wanted to tell my brothers. My thought process was that they had enough going on in their lives and didn't need to worry about having a sister with issues.
One night, my family had a birthday party, and I started to have a panic attack. I couldn't breathe, I cried, and I was shaking. It was awful. Well, one thing lead to another and my sister in laws thought I blamed them, and it started to cause issues with our family.
When it started to affect my mom and my dad's relationship with my brothers, I knew I had to do something about it. So, I text my brothers. I laid it all out there how I didn't feel love or that I belonged, how I felt they only tolerated me out of obligation, how I get I was a freak. I had to wait three hours for a response from my brothers. It made me so sick to my stomach waiting, I couldn't handle it.
Finally, my oldest two brothers emailed me. They made me feel loved. They made me happy. They made me know that I wasn't alone. I felt like I finally had a family who understood. And, they told my sister-in-laws how I was, and they finally understood. I felt like the family.
It wasn't the response I was expecting, but it was the biggest blessing, and I have never felt so close to my family before.