We have all been there. It is late you are with good friends and there is that little secret that you are dying to tell someone. And there are people sitting right there waiting to hear your delicious secret. So as you toss the idea around in your mind you hear yourself saying, “If I tell you, promise you won't tell anyone," and then you spill. Why do we do this? Is it for the attention or the moments of feel free of the weight we carry? Secrets and trust are two elements in our lives that are ready to break and broken.
My theory is that naturally as humans we have a hard time lying. Some people, granted, can do it well, but others like myself can’t even make anyone believe a small lie. So somewhere in our complex human minds we all have a little voice that whispers, “spill the secret!” and that urge usually jumps up when we are just getting to know people and want to gain their trust. What better way to gain the trust of someone then by telling them a “secret.” Then you both have this little bonding moment to secretly share. However, all of this trust building secret spilling will cost you in the long run.
How many times have we all had to go to your friend and do some back-peddling due to some secret spilling? This is the worst situation to be in because you didn’t tell the secret to just tell, but because you want to gain a friend. All secrets are different and so are all secret-spillers, but in the end trust is always broken.
Trust is gained and lost with secrets and that is the real struggle. Trust means everything in any relationship and how everyone handles secrets will determine everything. How do you handle your trust and secrets? Do you spill easy or do you keep bottled up? In a world of self-servers, I hope that everyone keeps their secrets bottled and locked away. No matter how tempting that little voice in your mind is to you. Trust is better than that moment of gratification after spilling a secret.
