One of the first things people say to me is, “Wow, you’re tall for a girl!”
It’s true, I am tall. I’m nearly 6 feet tall and I’m the shortest girl in my immediate family. When you think of tall women, you generally think of models. I’ve had many people tell me that I’m so tall that I could easily blend in with the models on television. I’ve also had people jokingly tell me how lucky I am to be able to reach the top shelf.
And then I’ve had people tell me that men like girls with long legs anyway, so I should consider myself lucky to be so tall. The common factor in all of this is that I’ve lived my entire life having people justify my own height to me. I am tall. I don’t want to be a model, I don’t want to play basketball, and I don’t want to be sexualized just because I have long legs.
Why is it that people always list away the advantages of being tall when they meet a woman who is over 5’6”? I know plenty of men who are just as tall, taller even, as me. I’ve never heard anyone tell them that they should consider themselves lucky to be able to reach a high shelf.
So, why is it that when it’s a girl who is tall, height becomes a concept that has to be justified. It’s not enough that I’m just tall, I have to fall into a category that justifies why I am the way I am.
A boy once told me that I was intimidating because of my height. He told me that it made him feel uncomfortable that I was taller than him, that girls should be short and petite. At the time, I found myself embarrassed. I was ashamed of my height, of something that I could not change about myself. I thought that my height made me not as feminine as the petite girls around me and I began to slouch in my school chairs.
At that time in my life, I wanted nothing more than to shrink down to a size that society deemed ‘normal’. I’ve grown since then, both physically and mentally. I’m not sorry that I’m tall. I’m not sorry that there are people who have to crane their neck to speak to me. I’m not sorry that I intimidate some boys with my height.
To that boy who made me self-conscious of my height, I’m sorry that you feel intimidated by a woman that you have to look up to. I’m sorry that the fact that you can’t look down at me makes you uncomfortable. I’m sorry that the fact that you didn’t like that I was just as tall as you. I’m sorry that you felt so intimidated that you had to make me feel small since I wasn’t as short as a “woman should be.”
I’m not sorry that I’m tall. This is the body I was born with, and that I love every inch and foot of it.
To the people that try to justify my height, stop it. I know you think that you’re comforting me, but you don’t have to. I might complain about it sometimes, and there will be days when I’m self-conscious of my height. If you want to comfort me, tell me to straighten my back and be myself.
Remind me that the only reason I feel insecure about my height is that society has tried their best to cram me into a box, but I’m too tall to fit. Remind me that it’s cramped in the box, and that it’s probably not worth my time anyway.
I’m not a model, I’m not a basketball player, and I’m not a long-legged beauty.
I’m just tall. And I'm okay with that.
