I Survived My First Year Of Long Distance

I Survived My First Year Of Long Distance

And I don't regret any of it.


As my freshman year comes to a close, so does the first year of living away from my boyfriend. Almost exactly a year ago we decided we were going to stay together as we went to separate colleges...across the country from each other. I go to school in Pennsylvania and he goes to school in California so there is literally 2400 miles between us and a 3 hour time difference. I was so scared and cried at the thought last year before we left for school. The unknown was terrifying and moving that far away from my best friend scared me to death. I didn't want things to change but the reality was that they were going to whether we wanted them to or not.

At the beginning of school, it was very difficult to adjust to. We both were in different worlds than we were used to and didn't have anyone physically there to help us through it all. We tried watching movies together over FaceTime...it wasn't the same. It actually made me more upset when we would try to do these things at first because it just reminded me how far away we were. But as time went on and we both had the opportunities to visit each other, we both calmed down.

Looking back, in some ways it was better for me to have my boyfriend farther than driving distance because I wouldn't have had to try to make friends if I could just escape to him every time I was uncomfortable at school. It pushed me to put myself out there and meet new people and actually work at building those new relationships. Of course I would have loved to have him with me as I did that but I know that I wouldn't have met as many people as I have or gotten as involved as I did.

We still text constantly and FaceTime at least once a day. Sometimes, when we're both busy that means a 5 minute phone call reminding each other that we love one another and ranting about our days. Other days, we can talk for an hour and just laugh and talk about every little detail that we missed out on. We always end every night (well, my nights around 12am but his 9pm) with a Good Night and a I love you. It's something that you get into a routine with and even though it's not perfect you get used to it.

Something that has been very important for my relationship, as for most long distance, is communication and trust. Without these two things, we both would have never gotten through the year together.

It has been an adjustment and I look forward to the day that we no longer have to take long plane rides to see each other for a weekend, text good night, or FaceTime to see each other's faces. But for now, I don't regret my decision in being in a long distance relationship and I cherish my time with my boyfriend in person and over the phone. Being able to be in love with my best friend is something I would never give up because of temporary distance.

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Being single is a choice, and it's nothing to be ashamed of.


It seems that any woman claiming her independence and declaring that she, in fact, likes being single is met with the same reaction every time. She's bitter or cynical or maybe just lying to herself so she can rest easier at night.

Whether it's society's incessant pressuring or primal nature screaming "MAKE BABIES," single girls are forced into thinking, What's wrong with me?

But, in most cases, a woman isn't single because she's unlovable or disagreeable — it's simply because she's strong enough to hold out for the right person. And maybe, just maybe, she's content with that.

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Single girls are single because they know their worth and value their time. Apps like Tinder and Bumble make it easy to start relationships, so, for the most part, if you really wanted a significant other, you could find one.

But why waste a second on something you know isn't right?

Of course, this is no slam on people in relationships. If you find someone that makes you happy, that is more than enough reason to be with him/her. And if it doesn't work out, that's OK. I'm talking about entering into relationships that you know from the get-go aren't worth a shot.

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