Suicide is a tragedy, not only for the person who committed it, but to those left behind.
While one soul tragically and suddenly leaves the Earth, dozens of souls are left behind wondering, why, how, when, what...
What could I have done differently?
How could I have stopped my daughter, son, friend, wife, husband, cousin, sister, brother, aunt, uncle, etc. That is the question barreling through the heads of the loved ones of said person. Could there have been intervention? Should they have seen the signs? Should they have seen this coming? Unfortunately, many times, even a note of explanation does not provide the comfort of knowing why they had to preform this act.
The most tragic part to me is the family or friend having to cope with the realization that the person they loved was also the person who took away the person they loved. I can't grasp how frustrating and heart-wrenching that must be... To know that the person you're in pain and suffering for is also the person who caused the pain and suffering.
Everyone reacts and copes differently with death and loss and hurt. One's persons reactions can be totally different than another. So as bystanders and observers, we must not judge the reactions of others. We must just try to understand the mindset that person is in. We must be a friend, a listener, a hand to hold and a shoulder to lean on.
While one person may decide to lock themselves in their house, never to leave unless it's absolutely essential, another might want to surround themselves with as many people as possible. One person might need to wallow in solitude, while another may want to be smiling as much as they can, with the ones they hold dear to their hearts. Each reaction, feeling, and mindset is different.
As a friend, family member, and co-worker, we must give that person the type of support they need, depending on the person. Each person is different in their reactions, and we must approach each situation as such.
When they are angry, let them be angry. Let them rant, let them get the fumes out. When they are sad, let them be sad. Let them cry, let them wallow. When they are happy, let them be happy. Let them share memories, embrace the happiness, let them smile, and encourage them to laugh. When they need to talk, let them talk. Be that listening ear, be that friend they can call. When they need to reason, let them reason. When they need to reason through the scenario in their minds, help them. Be as involved as they let you be. When they want to be alone, let them alone. Give them space. Do not hover. And of course, when they need you, be there, in any way that you can. Bake with them, go out with them, shop with them, take a drive with them, run with them.
Be open and understanding, for everyone is not the same. Each person copes differently, so cope with them in any way that they need, because they will need that more than anything.
