As I write this, I think about the times when communicating as a Southerner can be felt as a turn-off or curiosity. People can look down on us for displaying our politeness, gestures or dialect.

One of the worst problems for me is when I say "yes ma'am," or "yes sir," only to be told that makes the other person feel old. I'm not a difficult person, so I'll use their name. It can be aggravating and confusing when I decide to not use these terms to avoid this social problem, and then encounter someone who thinks I'm rude.There is no possible way to address every stranger the way they want to be addressed because people are different. Since we are in the South, I don't believe that I should be corrected. I wouldn't expect anyone to have to uphold a custom or language that I grew up with when I go to a different country.

One of the best ways to figure out if anyone understands Southern customs is to hold the door for them.

I'm not saying that I expect a thank you. I'm talking about how I get a weird look for holding a door for someone of the same-sex. As an individual, I don't believe that custom is only reserved for a gentleman to a woman. Honestly, it's best to hold the door, especially when so many people are trying to get out. It is a way to relieve tension and stress by letting people out first, and as a bonus, making others you don't even know feel cared for is a nice feeling.

I believe that doing little gestures for people when you don't have to helps form a stronger bond in the universal community that we share together, and I won't stop doing it. If I were to stop holding the door in the South, I'd get angry looks, so I do not see any harm in doing it in many situations.

I went to California and was met with questions on my accent. Some people said that it didn't sound like I was from the stereotypical South they see on tv played by non-southerners. There is nothing wrong with curiosity, but I wish there was a push for southerners being played by people with actual southern accents or more dialect training, so the notion of what a southern is wouldn't always be portrayed as an undermined individual with no brains. Outside of the South, you may be told you have a cute accent, or it is funny to hear. It is all opinion, but it can be a bit demeaning to some. I don't bat an eyelash at it, but there is not a defining lingo that everyone has to speak.