Maybe you have a friend, family member, or someone else you care about that you feel might be trapped in a bad relationship. Abusive relationships are, unfortunately, more common than we think. Most friends and family of abuse victims eventually pick up on the behavior and want to help.
First thing's first: you can only help someone if they want help. Lots of people in harmful relationships don't realize how toxic it may be. Be respectful and make sure you let them know you'll always be there for them no matter what. Earn their trust so they know they can open up and talk to you about anything.
Whether the abuse is physical, emotional, or sexual, many victims don't realize how serious it is until after the relationship is over. Abuse is a scary word. Often times, when we think about abuse, we think about the worst case scenario: a man beating a woman until she is all bruised and bloodied. Abuse comes in several different forms and shouldn't be overlooked for not being that worst case scenario.
Because your friend may not realize that their partner may be abusive, do not become frustrated with them. A lot of friends and family members become frustrated and confuse the deep manipulation they are under with stupidity. As frustrating as it may get watching a loved one making the wrong choice, you have to stay persistent with them.
Why is she still with him? He cheats on her, controls her, and even hits her sometimes. How can she be so oblivious and ignorant?
Your friend is probably very manipulated by their partner, as that is a very common sign of any type of abuse. Imagine your friend being under a spell that makes them constantly blame his/herself. It's not because they have no common sense. It's because they're partner may have burned this into their brain.
Remind them that they are their own person and that they never have to do anything based on what someone else wants them to do.
Remind them that you're always there for them, even if they continue to date this person and disappoint you. Be honest about how you feel, but do not force them to leave their partner or do anything else. The point of getting your friend away from this relationship is so that they can make their own decisions and grow as an individual.
Understand that they may struggle to realize how toxic their relationship is. With your help and guidance, they may open up to you and realize they need to leave their partner. And most importantly, let them know they are really loved and that what their partner is giving them is not love.
