I have always been bad about wishing away my life. In middle school I couldn’t wait to get to high school. In high school I couldn’t wait to get to college. Now, in college I catch myself thinking “I can’t wait until I’m done with this and have a real job.” I like to live in the future, but recently I have discovered that living for the future and not right now has made me a very unhappy person.
When I was 14, the only thing I wanted was to be in high school. I had so many expectations for what my life would be like once I got there. I thought I would be happier, have new friends, and make great memories. When high school came and went, I realized it was one of the unhappiest times of my life. While I did make some great friends and fun memories, it still wasn’t “the greatest 4 years of my life” like I thought it would be. Looking back, I remember thinking to myself “things will get better when I’m a sophomore”, “junior year will be so much more fun”, “I can’t wait to be a senior.” I isolated myself waiting for things to happen in the future that never would.
My freshman year of college arrived and I was excited at first. Soon I began saying to myself “when will this semester end?”, “I want to be a sophomore”, “I can’t wait to be done with school for good.” What I again thought was going to be a really happy and enjoyable time in my life was actual somewhat depressing me. I was putting so much pressure on myself that once a certain time came I would all the sudden be happy. I was so confused when I found myself growing unhappier. It took me a long time, but I finally realized when a new period in my life arose that I couldn’t just snap my fingers and be happy. I needed to start living in the present and stop wishing away my life hopping everything would get better once I got to the future.
I have wasted so much of my life just wishing it to go by quickly. Life is far too short to live like that. Not until recently have I learned how to live in the present. I stopped telling myself that my life will be better in the future, and now tell myself I can make it better now. I have started saying yes to every opportunity that comes my way. I have started living day to day instead of year to year. I finally feel myself becoming a happier person. I am starting to love my life again. Planning for the future is perfectly fine, but never wish away your life hoping to get there as soon as you can. Enjoy every little moment of everyday.
