594,081,984. That is how many seconds I've lived so far.
About a quarter of my life has already been lived and I can't even remember most of it because I was a kid. As for what I can remember, I feel like I've done nothing special except get good grades and pick up a few stories about my life that I can use to keep a conversation going. I'm always asking myself, "When am I going to start living?"
We all have a different version of what living is, but we can all agree that the goal of living is the same; we want to be able to be happy and die knowing we have no regrets. For a lot of people, that is impossible and stepping outside of our comfort zones is terrifying. We are so comfortable in our world and letting it come to us that we don't ever stop to think if we have to let it.
None of us think to swim against the current and take life into our own hands. None of us even think about it until we are faced with life-changing circumstances or stacking odds that force us to make decisions. But the power to change our fates is all right there inside of us.
Take a moment to imagine what living means to you. What action could you do to start living?
I imagine it is going on some huge adventure or falling in love and having it change your life forever (like Rose in Titanic). Or maybe it's becoming rich or famous.
Those things sound amazing and I myself would love to have one of those road trip adventures with friends and late night campfires on rocky cliffs. But that isn't living, not really. That's only traveling and doing something out of the ordinary that may be fun. It's not like in the movies where an adventure or having your dreams come true can bring you clarity into all of those life-reflecting moments that we crave for where we reach a point of transparency on what we can do to be happy.
People confuse "living" with dreams. The common denominator between the two is that you are happy. But you don't need to accomplish all your dreams to finally deserve and get happiness, you just need to find what makes you happy and find meaning in the things that come your way. For some people, fame is the only thing that makes them happy, or sometimes love. But for other people, what makes them happy is teaching others, helping people, drawing and creating, the things that make living matter to them.
A mother barely making minimum wage and living in a crap apartment with her teenage son could be just as happy as a Hollywood starlet.
It isn't about where you end up, it is how you end up where you are.
Which brings me to one of my points: we are all too blinded by our current lives to see the possibilities of where we can go, where we can be, how we can achieve our dreams.
Think about it, you could literally get up from your phone or computer, buy a train ticket to wherever, and start anew as a farmer or museum tour guide. I'm not saying you should do it, I'm just saying that that option has always been open to you if you're fearless enough to do it. You have at least $10 and feet and there is a lot you can do with that.
The expression, "You can be whatever you want," isn't just a thought. You can really become whatever the hell you want. Write a book, paint your walls black, go to a random cafe and sing, adopt a kid, buy a goldfish, ask someone out of your league out. All you need is bravery, a sense of ambition, and a dash of fear to get what you truly want.
Don't confuse your happiness with what you see on TV or with other people's lives, and don't let things come to you that you aren't excited about. Living is about having enough control over your life that you can choose between changing what makes you sad or keeping what makes you excited about waking up in the morning.
Go find your happiness, go live, and don't die knowing you could've done what you love doing right now.
