So lately, I've been thinking... and sure, there are times when being (a little) dishonest for the greater good is necessary. Maybe we shouldn’t even call it dishonesty—perhaps we should call it: “holding back from the complete truth” or “not sharing exactly how you feel.”

Nevertheless, I get it. Doing so can avoid conflict, arguments, disagreements, negative feelings, etc. It is an easy way out—it is safe. So, OK, telling your fellow group project member that you think their point of view sucks or that they decorated the powerpoint slides horribly and distastefully may not end in a positive experience. But those aren’t the situations I am referring to, and I think you know that.

I have always been too fearful to say too much, to feel something too deeply, to tell someone exactly how I feel about them. Honesty can be very revealing and can lead to vulnerability—which is something that I used to fear, but now, am aware of the great benefits it can bring. Vulnerability isn’t weakness, it is the exact opposite. Embrace times in your life when you are vulnerable—take them in and feel them completely. It can be so beautiful. It allows you to be completely open and present with yourself, the situation, and anyone else involved. Exposing yourself is brave and courageous, and if you’ve seen the Princess Diaries, you’d know that “courage isn’t the absence of fear but rather the judgment that something is more important than fear.”

There is absolutely no denying that it’s difficult, but why aren’t you allowing yourself to let your feelings and thoughts be known? They are valid and meaningful. Being honest with someone could change things significantly in many aspects of your life.

Let’s take a crush, for example. Personally, I am extremely good at doing this thing where I pretend I already know what my crush or the cute guy in my lit class (or whoever it happens to be in the situation) is thinking without even talking to them at all. I like to make up their thoughts, what their reasoning would be, and their feelings—or lack thereof—towards me. I think of every possible negative thing that could happen and I hold those things closely to me because if I expose myself and get rejected, the world will end right then and there, right? (WRONG!!!)

The problem with this is that I never actually know. I’m not taking chances, not pursuing things, not experiencing moments as fully as I should be experiencing them. I am missing out on lessons and experiences and feelings that I will never know unless I step up.

It is scary telling someone that you love them, that you admire them, that they mean a lot to you, that you would do anything for them—I know. You are being vulnerable and putting (at least some amount of) power into their hands. But what is wrong with that? They will take it or leave it. And while the leaving it part might hurt, you are learning and growing and that is what is important. I believe that things happen for a reason, anyway. What is meant to come to you will come to you, but I don’t think that is an excuse to sit around and wait for something to happen. You can and should play an active part in your life and what happens in it. You only get one.

So, the next time you think someone is cute—tell them! The next time someone changes you, inspires you, makes you think differently, makes you smile—tell them! Don't be afraid to tell your parents you love them in front of your friends, to admit your grandmother is your favorite person to spend time with, to admit that something is really difficult for you, to say "hey, I think we should do this instead of that." I know it’s cliché, but life really is too short to not be honest with people. It can really change everything.

And to change the famous quote, I will end with my own new rendition:

“It is better to have lived and lost than never to have lived at all.”