"How are you doing?"
"I'm fine."
"What was your day like?"
"It was fine."
"Do you want to order a pizza?"
"That's fine."
If I had a penny for every time those words came out of my mouth, I would be richer than the Kardashian family. Okay, maybe that's an exaggeration.
If there are any words in our vocabulary that are plaguing this generation, "fine" is at the top of the list. Saying fine in day-to-day conversation is like a reflex. As they put it ever so graciously in Mean Girls, it's word vomit. When someone asks me how I am doing, I can physically feel my teeth closing on my bottom lip to form the beginning "F" in fine, before the person has even finished asking me the question. Because believe me, I would not be caught dead actually saying anything interesting or honest about my day.
I hate to burst everyone's bubble, but chances that your feelings at every second of every day of your life can be described as fine are about the same as your chances of getting struck by lightening on the same day you found out you won the lottery. You are not fine all of the time. We are not robots people, we all have emotions.
When you ace an exam you spent all week studying for, you are not fine, you are excited.
When you find out that the person you love doesn't love you back anymore, you are not fine, you are heartbroken.
When your roommate doesn't keep up with their end of your shared chores, you are not fine, you are annoyed.
When you get to see your dog for the first time in months, you are not fine, you are overjoyed.
When you hear an unusual sound coming from outside when you are home alone, you are not fine, you are scared.
When your best friend cancels plans with you at the last minute, you are not fine, you are angry.
When someone you love passes away, you are not fine, you are grieving.
Society has gotten it into our brains that fine is a normal and acceptable description of our feelings during everyday life. Well, I am here to tell you that it's not.
I think of the word fine as excusatory. Saying it is like putting up a wall between you and the other person, and it prevents you from having genuine communication or dialogue with each other. How are you supposed to build relationships with others if you cannot even answer a basic question, about how you are doing, with honesty?
In an ideal world, the word "fine" would be abolished from our vocabulary. In reality, the chances that society will stop giving the F word lots of love are slim to none, but, hey, it is something to think about it. Let's be honest, I will probably say it at least five times tomorrow.
Every once in a while though, try throwing out a different adjective to describe your day. Because guess what? It is fine to not be fine.
