I have a bone to pick with Hollywood and American culture in general. The issue at hand: everyone’s hung up on people being in love.

Newsflash people: not everyone has to be “in love” with someone! In fact, it is possible to love someone without being “in love” with them. It is even possible to be content and happy while not being in love. I am sick of Hollywood, the internet and society insisting that the only love worth anything is romantic love.

The messages are everywhere: directors throw in romantic subplots that are pointless, distracting and overall irritating. The tabloids speculate on who’s dating who. The Internet is teeming with people who ‘ship’ people who are only friends and will only ever befriend or worse, relatives.

What is the message behind all of this? They seem to tell us that the only important relationships in life are those that are romantic—that friendship is either a cover for a romantic relationship or a step towards one, and that unless we are romantically involved with someone, we are less than everyone else who is, and that getting a significant other will fix all our emotional troubles.

I reject every single one of those beliefs. I refuse to accept that two people—whether they are both men, both women, or one of each—cannot simply be good friends. To believe anything else is to condemn everyone to a life devoid of true friendship and to a life filled with the haunting paranoia that people are misinterpreting attempts at friendship as flirtation.

I cannot tolerate the thought that romance is the only love worthy of celebrating, nor the notion that romance is somehow the answer to all my problems. To accept such a ridiculous notion would elevate the beloved to a place of worship. When you begin to worship a human being, you give them control of your life and begin doing things you never thought you would. It can be small things: avoiding other people you care about, arguing with people you once saw eye to eye with or giving up things you previously enjoyed. Or it can be bigger things: abandoning your family, quitting your dream job and compromising your convictions.

I won't swallow the lie that singleness is something to pitied. When that message gets across and burrows its way into the heart of individuals, they begin to wonder what is wrong with them. Is there something they are doing wrong? Are they not worthy of love?

There is nothing further from the truth. Being single is not the mark of someone that is missing something, doing something wrong or is otherwise inferior to those who are in a relationship. In the same way, being in a relationship is not necessarily proof that someone is a healthy, well-adjusted member of society.

There is nothing wrong with romantic love; it is a beautiful thing. But there is more to love than romance. Love amongst friends and family is every bit as important and as worthy of frequent and strong celebration. And I understand. Romance is so exciting. But when it is over-emphasized people, begin to put too much faith in it, and that leads to more (and deeper) heartbreaks.

Romance is not the emotional duct tape of the world. Love as a whole can heal us, but romance alone is not enough.

In his book The Four Loves C.S. Lewis said, “We need other physically, emotionally, intellectually; we need them if we are to know anything, even ourselves.” We need other human beings. Not just one, but many. And that requires love to take on different forms. That is why it is important that we stop exalting romance above the other loves.