This week I attended school with a simple hypothesis to test. I believed that if I looked every person I passed in the eyes and smiled, a simple and genuine act of kindness, they would look away.
Unfortunately, this hypothesis is still untested because as I attempted this with each and every person I passed, I was the one to instinctively look away. Me, the one with the hypothesis to test and a typically friendly disposition; nine times out of ten, I can be found smiling and I make it a priority to look people in the eyes whenever I am communicating with them.
This brought on one of the five w’s, why? Why is it that someone who confidently will talk to any stranger is unable to look one in the eyes and smile?
From the moment we were able to talk, we were told, “Don’t talk to strangers”. It has been inbred into us. This has created a culture of people too afraid to talk to one another because perhaps the only reason they are being nice to you is because they want something from you in one way or another or they have hidden intentions. This alone is discouraging enough to make even the kindest of people afraid to offer some sort of friendly gesture to anyone, let alone a stranger.
I blame this lack of common courtesy and friendliness for many of the problems that plague our society such as stereotypes and even the absence of manners. How could we expect people to understand people who are different from them if we teach them to only talk to the people they know? How can we expect simple pleases and thank yous to be used on strangers if even those would technically fall under the category of talking to strangers? How do we explain the instances when it is and isn't okay to talk to strangers? It all baffles me.
Although I have difficulty looking people in the eyes, I can usually find something to talk about with anyone I encounter. I have been a witness to all different kinds of responses to my talking to strangers and trying to connect with them. Everything from rude looks like “why are you talking to me, you weirdo?” to friendly smiles, laughs, and conversations.
Good or bad, I have learned so much from these simple conversations while doing something like looking for shampoo. Such as how kind and loving so many people in this world are. They give me hope in a world filled with hate. A hope that is already hard to find but is made even harder by the stigma behind talking to strangers. The fear that something bad will come from it.
Yes, this world has a lot of bad people. Bad people who have done and will do horrible things in this world. Bad people who a lot of times, cannot be distinguished from the good people right away. Does that mean there are not just as many good and honest people, though? Does that mean we should shut out everyone because there is a chance we may encounter a bad seed now and then? Does that teach us anything or help us to grow in any way? I think not.
