This wasn’t the first time and it wasn’t and won’t be the last time I face harassment like this. I was in eighth grade, almost done with the year and ready to move to high school, when a boy sexually harassed me during school and after school. To be honest, he sexually assaulted me. For so long I was scared to talk about this incident, but it’s time.

I will not get into details because I want some things to remain private, but I want to tell the world why I stood up for myself. When I first came to my parents about this boy harassing me, they both reached for the phone to call the school. It was 7:30 pm and the school had been closed for three hours. They were the only ones to show support. My mom called the school the next day, despite me telling her not to since we were almost done with school for the summer, and I was called down to the principal’s office. What I didn’t know is that they already talked to the boy.

I walked into the office and the assistant principal and counselor were awaiting my arrival. They asked me to tell them everything about what happened and I did so, not withholding any information. The principal looked at me when I finished and said, “Is everything you just told me the truth? You’re making a big allegation and you can really hurt his future. I just want to make sure you think of everything before you say yes.” Then the counselor chimed in, “No other girl has done this before. No one has actually said yes. Are you sure you really want to do this to him?”

They asked me if they can invite him into the room and I said no. When I was entering into the main office to get to the principal’s office, I saw him and he looked at me and said, “you will pay for this”. The secretary told him to be quiet and told me I could enter the office.

I was fourteen years old at the time. I have been harassed for the past four months. Teachers have seen the signs, especially since he was in 5/8 of my classes, and they did nothing. Now a principal and counselor want me to think of his life? What about how it affected me? I hardly think his consequence of avoiding me for the rest of the year (2 weeks) was anywhere near the emotional damage I felt after this situation. I understand he could have been bullied his entire life, going through a hard time, and he had to take it out on me, but he didn’t. I have been sexually harassed many times over, yet you don’t see me doing the same. He made a choice and I made mine.

I will never say to any victim of sexual harassment that they have to stand up to their assaulter. I haven’t 9/10 times I’ve been a victim. Honestly, I wasn’t planning on saying anything until the principal and counselor said what they did. I was scared he would do something or his friends would. But then they asked me why I would ruin someone’s life. I wasn’t ruining his life; I was making sure he would never ruin another’s life.

Well, his friends did find out what happened. My friends heard of rumors, but I was sternly told by the principal not to share any information or else he would not have the stipulations to stay away from me. The principal told me, “If you tell anyone the details, I will tell this boy that he can say anything to you and all consequences will be put on you.” So, if you knew me back then and asked me questions, I’m sorry. I was too scared.

I was destroyed for a couple years after that with any boy wanting to get close to me or even any situation similar to the eighth grade one. Finally, being a sophomore in college, I chose to not only stand up for myself six years ago, but now I write this article to encourage others to stand up.

I’ve been told he is a good guy now; he transferred from my high school after freshman year, so I didn’t know what happened to him. I hope that me standing up, changed even the smallest bit of his brain to not do it again. But he made the choice to change, and I applaud him.

Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself even against authority figures. But don’t feel that you are worth any less if you don’t stand up. It takes courage to come back after any assault. So, I am just proud of you for waking up each day after, whether the world knows what happened or only the people involved know. Don’t underestimate the power of family and friendships during a hard time as well, sometimes they are all you have.