Why It's Okay To Stay Close With Your Friends From High School While In College

Why It's Okay To Stay Close With Your Friends From High School While In College

"Remember that the most valuable antiques are dear old friends" -H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
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We live under the impression that once we go off to college, that's it. The life we knew before graduation will cease to exist, leaving behind just a shadow of what had been. We're told that odds are our best friends - the ones we stayed up until 3 o'clock in the morning talking with, the ones who posed with us for prom pictures, the ones who taught us what real friendship was - will not be our best friends after we start college. By not fault of our own, people simply grow apart. They find new friends, join clubs and organizations; reinvent themselves and become individuals whom their friends from high school do not recognize.

The real travesty is when we allow this to happen; when we allow the naysayers to be right. With all the technology our generation has access to, there is nothing holding us back from maintaining those relationships that defined who we were as adolescents and who we would become as adults in college. We have opportunities to keep in touch through Facebook, texting, Skype, that our parents did not as some of them embarked on the same journey we take now. Unless you just truly want to escape the high school world, there is no excuse for not keeping in touch.

But let us dissolve this horrible idea that we cannot stay close with our friends in high school for fear of not being able to move on, make new friends and mature. That being 45 minutes to 6 hours away, means that the friendship will fade away because of distance.

It is okay to have those old friends and new friends too. There is no rule about leaving those who mean so much behind when you start a new life while away from them. They acted as your family outside of your own, as you guided one another through the awkward and most defining period of your lives. College is yet another defining experience in your life. You actually begin to figure out the person you are and only thought you knew in high school. It is the ‘old friends’ who shaped us as individuals so that we could make new friends in college. Is it not a comforting feeling knowing you have people waiting for you, counting on you, to still be waiting for them too? There is a kind of beauty in knowing that even as we were learning how to be good people and good friends throughout high school, that we touched someone’s – or even multiple someone’s – life enough for them to want to stay in it; even if it means not seeing one another for months a time. There's beauty in knowing friendships can last a lifetime, so long as you choose to preserve them.

Cover Image Credit: Katelin Gandee

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An Open Letter To The Friend Who Became My Sister

Love is thicker than blood.
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Sis,

There are friends. Then, there are best friends.

According to "Grey’s Anatomy’s" Meredith Grey and Cristina Yang, they're your person. The one who, “if I murdered someone, I’d call you to help me drag the corpse across the living room floor.” You’re so much more to me than any of those titles can express.

As I’ve matured throughout the years, I’ve come to the conclusion that good friends with good hearts serve an incredibly important purpose in our lives, going above and beyond what we give them credit and appreciation for.

The family we choose. You’re one of those.

The day we met, I knew that you were going to play an important role in my life. What I had no idea of was that you would join the cast of my life with a starring role.

First, I need to say thank you. Thank you for always coming to my locker to check in before class during high school. Thank you for letting me control the music on road trips. Thank you for sharing your family with me, and addressing my family as if you were born into it.

Thank you for patiently listening to the physical embodiment of a broken record when I complain about the same boy I’ve loved since senior year. Thank you for tagging along on every doctor’s appointment, grocery run, and trip to the post office, just because you know that I hate doing things alone.

Thank you for not thinking twice before dialing when I text you “please call me.” Thank you for never saying no to a coffee date. Thank you for never giving up on me. Thank you for being my better half.

We don't share the same genetic makeup, but after all the sleepovers, heart-to-heart conversations, shopping until our bank accounts cry, and swapping clothes so often that we don’t know what belongs to whom, how could I not consider you family? We have shared some my fondest memories together, and I wouldn’t want them to feature anyone but you.

You’ve been with me on my best days, and loved me on my worst. You know how to make me laugh when all I want to do is crawl into a hole and die.

Picturing sitting in my car with you in the passenger seat makes me long for summer, where we spend three months together doing all of our favorite things. You’ve seen me naked, done my makeup, and warned me before making a poor decision. Being away from you for extended periods of time makes me feel incomplete.

You are a piece of me that I am not quite whole without. You taught me that blood doesn’t make a family; love does.

You know me better than I know myself, which is both amazing and terrifying. You make me realize I’m enough for this world, and that means more to me than I know how to express in the limited words that make up the English language.

You remind me that I am more than my mistakes, and you keep me grounded when I spiral out of control. You’ve helped me carry my burdens along with your own, even when the universe comes down on you full force, way harder than you deserve.

You’re the one I come to for the truth if I think my new dress makes me look fat, and I know you’ll be honest. I trust you with my whole heart. You know the gory details about every boy I’ve ever crushed on, every professor who was an absolute jerk, and every fight I’ve had with my mom.

I wouldn’t make it in this life without someone who already understands and listens to every thought going through my head and each thing I seriously over think, even when you know, though you don’t say, it won’t matter in a week.

With all these affectionate things being said, don’t forget our fights. The few we’ve had were very real. We still don’t see eye to eye on some events of the past, but I never told my mom about it because there was no need to make her choose a side between me and her “second daughter.

We have learned to move forward, because the love we have for each other overwhelmingly outweighs any disagreement we’ve had, and always will.

Through all the tears and laughs, I don’t think that anything the world has to offer could seriously come between us. You go to a different school than me now, and college has rudely gotten in the way of our routine of spending every waking moment together.

Since we met, we’ve grown separately without growing apart. Neither of us are the same person we used to be all those years ago. Even so, we’ve pushed each other to our limits and you’ve given me the courage to keep going and do things that make me happy.

We lean on each other when it’s been a bad day and all we want to do is to snuggle and indulge in whichever show the other is currently watching unceasingly and unabashedly for comfort (it’s the little things). Having you as my co-pilot on this crazy ride called life has been frustrating, exciting, slightly concerning, absolutely insane, and something I don’t know how I would live without, and I don’t intend to find out.

I’ll conclude this letter with a quote from every basic, white girl’s favorite musical, “I don’t know if I’ve been changed for the better, but because I knew you, I have been changed for good.”

Love you forever,

Your sis

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Sister, Thank You For Always Being My Backbone And Always Having My Back

I can't even express into words how grateful I am to have you as my sister, because I know that you are one of the people on this Earth that genuinely just wants to see me happy and thriving.
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Dear Sister,

Thank you for always being honest with me; whether I want to hear it or not.

I know at times I don't tend to think about things rationally and I can get ahead of myself. Thank you for always being my voice of rationality and reason, even though I sometimes get mad at you for telling me the complete, honest truth because it is not what I'm wanting to hear.

Thank you for having my best interest at heart.

I can't even express into words how grateful I am to have you as my sister, because I know that you are one of the people on this Earth that genuinely just want to see me happy and thriving.

Thank you for teaching me how it is possible to be so angry or upset with another person at times, yet still love them unconditionally.

I know our fights can sometimes get ugly and intense, but I know that we love each other no less even when we're extremely pissed off at one another.

Whether it's because you borrowed my shirt without asking or because we were just giving one another attitude, I know that our fights won't last for more than a few hours- if they're REALLY bad, maybe even a couple of days, max.

Thank you for just being my shoulder to cry on or vent to after I'm sad over a stupid boy, get into a fight with Mom or Dad or just a compilation of little things I choose to unnecessarily get upset about sometimes.

It's a true blessing to have someone like you in this life because I know for a definite fact that I can always go to you with whatever it is that's on my mind.

Even if it's something that you get annoyed with me for talking about over and over, or just something you don't want to hear, I know that I can always count on you to listen and never judge.

Most importantly, thank you for being you.

There is nobody on this earth that knows me like how you know me, because of the special "sibling connection" bond we share. Thanks for getting my sense of humor and always seeming to know what I'm thinking.

Our bond is something I cherish and am so blessed to have you as my person and sis throughout this lifetime.

So thank you, Sis, for being you, and for always being there.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

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