When I was eleven, my parents got a divorce. Before you feel sympathetic for me, hear me out. They did not have a happy marriage and were constantly arguing. I never saw them kiss unless 6-year-old me asked them to. "That's what parents are supposed to do, right?" I love both my mom and dad bunches, but things just don't work sometimes -- that's okay! It leaves room for personal improvement and learning self love on both sides of the relationship. Although it was a pretty rocky divorce and aftermath, things began to settle down when my mom got remarried in 2013. Blending our two families went remarkably well. My family moved, so subsequently I got a bigger house, a bigger room, a bigger bed, a bigger dog and a bigger yard. I lived much closer to both of my best friends, I could even see one of their houses from mine. The only down side to mixing our families is the fact that I went from being second oldest to fifth oldest. That's right, I gained 3 triplet older brothers. But, this gaining of things is nothing compared to the happiness that came with actually having my new family.
Mom started baking again -- a happy quality I hadn't seen in a very long time. We get to see what an actual happy marriage looks like, which is especially good for my younger siblings. Sometimes I'll catch my parents give each other a peck while cooking dinner, or holding hands in the living room watching a movie. They'll go out on dates, to themed parties (see photo below), or just stay in and have Redbox movie dates (to which I happily third wheel on). You can sense the happiness radiating from them; so much so that even my friends and others notice.
After my mom and dad's divorce, we were tight on money. I'd never really spend money on things I didn't need, and wouldn't ask for money unless it was absolutely necessary. When Mom was dating Tom, my stepdad, we all went to a football game. Right before halftime, Tom handed me a twenty dollar bill and said, "Why don't you go get you and the little one's whatever you want from the concession stand?" It wasn't really a question up for debate, but a statement. I just remember my jaw dropping a little and looking at my mom, to which she just smiled and nodded. My siblings and I were on cloud nine, and so so thankful. That memory always sticks out to me when Tom says, "Money's the easy part." meaning: Let's figure out the other stuff first, money isn't as important. I don't know if it's something in the water, but Tom and I are a lot alike. We are both math geniuses, diehard K-State fans, and quite tech-savvy. Okay, actually I'm not any of those things, but we do have the exact same sense of humor. That's a tried-and-true fact, which has been proven many times during family game nights of Apples To Apples. We just always seem to pick each other's cards without trying. It must run in the family! Not only do we have the same sense of humor, we're both really funny. For instance, Tom once told me that if Mom asks him to hold her purse, he holds it under his arm like a football to make it manly... I guess the same thing goes for holding my dog.
My older brother and I have always had more of a friendship than a big brother/little sister relationship, but with my blended family, I gained that relationship I've always wanted. It just wasn't in the cards for me and my blood brother to act that way. My stepbrothers have never had a sister, but right away, Steven was very protective of my sister and I. He goes out of his way to show it, but it has never been that annoying, "my big brother won't get off my case," type of thing. It's nice to feel protected, but not suffocated. We've become pretty good at reading each other, can communicate with just a look, and cherish our limited time spent together. I know I could take literally anything to him and he'd be supportive and loving. I think we're overdue for another sibling date, too!
With 5 of us being old enough to date and have freedom to go out with our friends, we have an extended family of our own. My parents are no stranger to that, so they welcome our friends and love interests into our home and family just like any of their kids, no questions asked. I love that about them.
Sure, there's been arguments and disagreements, but what family doesn't have those? You love each other to pieces, but you've got to have a happy balance of bickering. Each member of the family is completely different. So, you get us all together and it's nine totally different personalities harmonized into one big family. It leads to interesting conversation, lots of catching up to do, and loads more love and happiness.
