WARNING: This article contains excessive amounts of sarcasm that may result in a realization of others' ridiculousness. Reader's discretion is advised.
Two weeks ago, Target added a new sweater to their cozy sweater montage. Since then, this red and green knit sweater labeled OCD (Obsessive Christmas Disorder) has struck quite a controversy. Many are claiming that it “makes light of a mental illness." In this same week Nordstrom had a similar problem with a Hanukkah themed sweater that read “Chai Maintenance.” While, both companies apologized for any offense they may have caused there has been a bigger matter afoot these past few weeks….the lack of holiday cheer on red Starbucks cups everywhere. That’s right, due to a new creative approach, Starbucks has officially gone graphic-less on their iconic red cups for the holiday season and people are not having it. Long winded-posts have started popping up left and right and people for the sake of being true to tradition have even started changing their names just to satisfy their Christmas joy.
Some people have even gone so far as to say that Starbucks is raging a war on Christmas! Some people say this is ludicrous, well I think not! The style and color cup that my lattes and frapps go into from November to January matter. I mean if I wanted a mainstream $2 cup I would go to 7-11. Am I right?! That being said I took to social network cites and news websites everywhere gathering the words of supporters to help uplift my spirits during this tragic time…however all I could find was one angry person by the name of Joshua Feurestein, who had this to say about Starbucks’ new look:
Well you hear that guys, for those of you who agree with Starbucks new look, you have no brain. There I said it. Thank goodness mines is still intact.
Starbucks had this to say in response:
The cup is meant to be a "blank canvas" that encourages "customers to tell their Christmas stories in their own way."
Well you know what crazy Joshua and I have to say to that: “We don’t want to draw our own memories. What we want are generalized depictions of what the world has deemed as symbols of Christmas on a monochromatic cup in white ink. Okay.” If you can’t do that then I will be tricking every Starbucks in a 50 mile radius that my name is Holly McJingle Christmasclaus for the next 2 ½ months. So Starbucks everywhere please bring back the Holiday themed cups…or at least provide us with white chalk markers…just saying.
