I am guilty of being a bystander. I never used to speak up for those who can't, and if I felt something wasn't right, I would keep my mouth shut because "it wasn't my business." That is something I have been trying to change, not only in real life but online as well.
The other night I was at the gym, and I was standing by this couple who at first glance looked as though they were just working out together like any other couple does at the gym. Well, what was different about this couple was the way the man, or should I say boy, was talking to the woman. He was belittling her and the way she was working out, making rude and harsh comments about how she is lazy and much more. You may say, “Oh, well I am sure he was just joking,” but that was not the case this time. He not only was telling her she was lazy, he said exactly, “Come on, you can do better, why are you so lazy?” followed by things like, “No, you have to lift heavier, you have awful form, you can never do this right.” This went on for abut 10 minutes, and I was starting to get very irritated and frustrated. The girl stayed silent, like women are always told to do. The man was using her to feel better about himself, and I wonder if it worked.
This time was different, though. I had to say something to him or her. I offered her some encouraging words saying how amazing she was doing (may I just let you know that she was not only doing everything right, but she had bigger biceps than him). He responded with the ever gentlemen-like response, “Are you serious? No, she’s not.” After correcting him on his false statement, he continued on his way with her trailing behind him. Did I change anything? Probably not. He is most likely going to continue on with his insecure behavior until she realizes she is worth more, but I do think me saying something was worth it.
My friend told me that I would always find people like him in the world, but every time I say something and stand up for people, it makes a difference. I do believe that some people will never change, but what if some do? What if standing up to someone else gives other people the confidence to stand up for themselves and someone else as well? It can’t hurt, it can only help.
After this small situation I came across a video on Facebook, showing a plethora of scenes and scenarios of people committing crimes, violence, rape and more, and then turning to the camera and saying, “Hey thanks for not saying anything.” The video was aimed to show that every time you keep your mouth shut, you are helping the criminals. You can disagree all you want with the acts, but the minute you decide to not say anything, you are giving them everything. It takes one, one person to bring awareness and attention to a bad situation. One will lead to many, and by standing up for others, you will give people the confidence to do the same. Pass it on.
