I think it is basic human nature to be curious about the past of the person you are in a relationship with. Of course, by past, we mean who they used to date. When social media stalking takes over and you make it your goal to find out all of the juicy information ASAP it can get a little stressful. The dozens of times my girls and I have embarked on these information gathering adventures have all resulted in essentially the exact same pattern and conversation. These are the emotions and thoughts you experience while stalking your bae's ex.
1. Nicknaming.
You have officially found their tag on his old Instagram posts and so you click over to her profile and think of all the ways her name can be turned into something ugly. Whether it be through rhyming or whatever mean name you can come up with, you and the ladies now officially have something to call "that ex."
2. "OH MY GOSH WHY IS SHE SO PRETTY?"
The next step obviously involves scrolling through every single photo you can find of said ex and analyzing every single bodily feature to look for flaws. Yes, this officially makes girls the worst but we know we do it.
3. Timeline.
Obviously, we need to figure out the exact times that they dated and if it rolled into any important dates. Then we can fact check too if something ever comes up (evil...)
4. Their exes, exes and current prospect.
Yeah, this is important too... Is the current guy you're dating the hottest one she ever dated, is she still stuck on him?! Has she moved on to someone else??
5. Tagged photos are next.
This is how you can tell what their embarrassing secrets are. Or if they maybe aren't as photogenic as you originally thought.
6. How many photos they still have of your man on their accounts.
If they still have every single photo of your guy it's pretty obvious that they are still hanging on pretty hard. A few is okay, marks that time period in her life but doesn't erase them completely. None is a little suspicious and makes you wonder if things ended really negatively. This can tell A LOT.
7. If they are still friends with his family and best friends.
This definitely shows what kind of terms these two ended on. Good or bad? It also shows if his mom is still gonna be stuck on her when you finally get brought home. If the family hasn't moved on it makes it especially hard for the guy to move on.
8. Does she still follow him?
If she is following him, does she still like photos and posts? More importantly, does he still like HER photos and posts?
9. The best friend reassurance that you are prettier, smarter and more talented.
Thank you to all of the friends who tell us time and time again that we are indeed, the better choice for our current man. Also to the ones who lie and say the ex is not cute when we know for a fact that they are way gorgeous.
10. When her account is private so you make a fake one to follow her.
You just gotta do what you gotta do. Every girl will tell you they haven't done this if you ask... but it is inevitably obvious that most of us have.
11. When three months have passed and there are officially more photos of you than there are of her.
You might still check up on her occasionally but you no longer have any real threat toward your relationship. This is the best time where you can feel blissfully happy and like the only woman in your guys life.
