Spring Semester As Told By The Cast Of 'Archer'
Start writing a post
Entertainment

Spring Semester As Told By The Cast Of 'Archer'

Something something... danger zone.

51
Spring Semester As Told By The Cast Of 'Archer'

The cast of "Archer" is full of drunken degenerates set on partying all day and doing their work only when they absolutely have to. Sound familiar? Your spring semester may have more in common with these secret agents than you might have previously thought.


Whether you partied your winter break away or caught up on your favorite Netflix shows, you got used to not having to do that annoying thing called "going to class." Classes may have just started but you're so done, so instead of paying attention in class like a good student, you go to class, sign the attendance sheet, and then dip.

If you do stay in class, you're more likely to be hate-stalking your ex than you are to be actually taking notes.

Now that you're back, you're free to terrorize the local bars once again. Happy hour, you have been missed.

Except that your month-long sabbatical means that your liver grew unaccustomed to crappy bottom shelf liquor, the ultimate college staple, so you promptly die.

After syllabus week, you tell your friends you're actually gonna buckle down, do your work, go to class, and quit drinking, but they are ... less than enthusiastic. Especially at the "quit drinking" part.

So despite your solemn vow, you happen to find yourself out at the bars the very next night.

And you decide, "Screw it, plenty of people can drink and pass their classes... right?"

Meanwhile, in the classes that you (sometimes) go to, your professor decides to bore you with tales of their life outside of the classroom, as if you, like... care.

And when they're not regaling you with tales of their cat or whatever, they're trying to ruin your life by committing the worst sin known to man... assigning group projects.

You get assigned to your group, and you pray that they're not complete idiots. But God isn't fond of degenerates so he decides to punish you, and guess what? Your group is comprised solely of idiots.

In an effort to save your grade, you decide to just do all the work yourself and save yourself the hassle.


In a last ditch effort to forget the group project trauma, you decide to continue the vicious cycle and drink your sorrows away.

Your life is also a constant struggle of trying to get in shape for whatever your spring break plans are, so you either eat too little,

or you stress-binge and eat too much.

After weeks of partying too hard and too often, your financial aid fund has run dry, so you're forced to bed the parents to send some cash before you die (or worse, get sober).

Thanks to the cold weather, all your friends are cuddling with their baes and getting into relationships, but you're stuck dealing with your on-again-off-again "I don't know what to call this relationship" thing, which means you probably aren't making the ... best decisions, romantically.


You're at that stage where you drunk text your sometimes-bae at 3 a.m., 50 times in a row until you fall asleep crying into your Taco Bell.


So, all in all, a completely normal semester! All that's left to do now is survive until spring break, and then get ready to do it all again in fall.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Olivia White

"The American flag does not fly because the wind moves it. It flies from the last breath of each solider who died protecting it."

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Separation Anxiety in Pets

Separation anxiety in pets is a real thing and recognizing the warning signs is important.

207547

Since March, Covid-19 required most of the world to quarantine in their homes. Majority of people ended up working from home for nearly five months. This meant pet owners were constantly with their pets giving them attention, playing with them, letting them out etc. Therefore, when the world slowly started to open up again and pet owners began returning to normal life work schedules away from the home, pet owners noticed a difference in the way their pet acted. Many pets develop separation anxiety especially during this crazy time when majority people were stuck inside barely leaving the house.

Keep Reading... Show less
Robert Bye on Unsplash

I live by New York City and I am so excited for all of the summer adventures.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

The invention of photography

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

363504

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Exposing Kids To Nature Is The Best Way To Get Their Creative Juices Flowing

Constantly introducing young children to the magical works of nature will further increase the willingness to engage in playful activities as well as broaden their interactions with their peers

1764161

Whenever you are feeling low and anxious, just simply GO OUTSIDE and embrace nature! According to a new research study published in Frontiers in Psychology, being connected to nature and physically touching animals and flowers enable children to be happier and altruistic in nature. Not only does nature exert a bountiful force on adults, but it also serves as a therapeutic antidote to children, especially during their developmental years.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

5 Simple Ways To Give Yourself Grace, Especially When Life Gets Hard

Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we are becoming.

1118245
Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

If there's one thing I'm absolutely terrible at, it's giving myself grace. I'm easily my own worst critic in almost everything that I do. I'm a raging perfectionist, and I have unrealistic expectations for myself at times. I can remember simple errors I made years ago, and I still hold on to them. The biggest thing I'm trying to work on is giving myself grace. I've realized that when I don't give myself grace, I miss out on being human. Even more so, I've realized that in order to give grace to others, I need to learn how to give grace to myself, too. So often, we let perfection dominate our lives without even realizing it. I've decided to change that in my own life, and I hope you'll consider doing that, too. Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we're becoming. As you read through these five affirmations and ways to give yourself grace, I hope you'll take them in. Read them. Write them down. Think about them. Most of all, I hope you'll use them to encourage yourself and realize that you are never alone and you always have the power to change your story.

Keep Reading... Show less
Entertainment

Breaking Down The Beginning, Middle, And End of Netflix's Newest 'To All The Boys' Movie

Noah Centineo and Lana Condor are back with the third and final installment of the "To All The Boys I've Loved Before" series

995592
Netflix

Were all teenagers and twenty-somethings bingeing the latest "To All The Boys: Always and Forever" last night with all of their friends on their basement TV? Nope? Just me? Oh, how I doubt that.

I have been excited for this movie ever since I saw the NYC skyline in the trailer that was released earlier this year. I'm a sucker for any movie or TV show that takes place in the Big Apple.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

4 Ways To Own Your Story, Because Every Bit Of It Is Worth Celebrating

I hope that you don't let your current chapter stop you from pursuing the rest of your story.

654662
Photo by Manny Moreno on Unsplash

Every single one of us has a story.

I don't say that to be cliché. I don't say that to give you a false sense of encouragement. I say that to be honest. I say that to be real.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments