The other day I was in class when I heard a professor say "I know, that was so retarded!" Other people in my class laughed at the joke while I just cringed. How, in this day and age, are we still using the R-word and how is it still okay?! I really did think that we had made progress on using such mean and derogatory terms, but here was a college professor using it.
The first thing a person says when I ask them not to use the R-word is, "I didn't mean it like that" or "I would never call a special needs person that." But if you wouldn't say something to someone's face because you know it would offend them, then why say it at all?
The first record of the word "retarded" was in 1895. The term was used to replace words like idiot, moron, and imbecile. It is defined as "less advanced in mental, physical, or social development than is usual for one's age." So as the definition and original use shows, it was a word that did not have a positive connotation. It was calling someone stupid or making fun of someone who had developmental problems. So why are we still using the R-word whether we mean it in a negative way or not?
I have been lucky enough to have a lot of experience as I interned and volunteered at an equine-assisted therapy barn which helped numerous people with varying levels of intellectual disabilities. I’m also lucky enough to have an amazing cousin that has muscular dystrophy and autism. These individuals have touched my life in ways I never will be able to fully explain to people who do not know them. In their world, the R-word makes it seem as if they cannot do what everyone else can do. They are limited in the form of a disability. But to me and to everyone who knows them, their "limitations" give them the ability to teach others that there is no true definition of normal. I have learned way more from them than anyone else in my life. They have taught me to love and accept others freely and without limitation. They have been judged all of their lives, yet they do not have a judgemental bone in their body. They have shown me how to see the best people and most importantly, they taught me what it is like to be a true friend.
Because of this, I will never understand why the R-word is still being used! It does not matter who you say it to or how you mean it, just saying it is extremely offensive and makes you very ignorant. By just using the R-word, you are hurting people whether you mean to or not. You are hurting those who would NEVER hurt you. All I am asking it that you stop and think before you use the R-word. Because your use of the word hurts everyone with a disability including their friends and family.
It is 2016. We are fighting for #AllLivesMatter and that includes those who have a disability! But those people are not defined by their disability. So it is the time you stop using the R-word. I challenge you all to broaden your vocabulary. I challenge you to say what you want to say without choosing words that are offensive to others. Use the other good R-word instead: respect.
Take a pledge to stop using the R-word by clicking the following link! Spread the word to end the word. The only way to stop the use of it is to spread the word!
