17 SpongeBob Quotes That Are Acceptable To Scream Mid-Orgasm

Like every other millennial, SpongeBob is the core of my childhood. Even as a 20-year-old, I could probably recite key quotes from any episode I watch. However, the older I get, the more I realize how sexual the show is (no wonder why I am the way I am). In honor of my childhood, here are the best lines that could double as dirty talk during your next booty call.

1. When bae tells you to spread your legs

— "I'm ready, I'm ready."

2. When you take your clothes off but still feel sexy AF

— "I'm ugly and I am proud."

3. When he wants head but you forgot the grapefruit

— "Firmly grasp it in your hand."

4. When they go down and you forgot that you haven't showered in two days

— “Do you smell it? That smell, the kind of smelly smell. A smelly smell that smells... smelly.”

5. When he's riding you and he forgot to drink two liters of water and gets a cramp

— "My leg."

6. When bae teases you and have to stay strong and act cool till you get fucked

— "I don't need it... I NEED IT."

7. When he puts all of his weight on you when he is on top

— "Excuse me, sir, but you’re sitting on my body, which is also my face."

8. When the head is lacking so you give subtle hints on how you can improve

— "Technique!"

9. When bae hits that spot and you lose your fucking mind

— "Meenehoymeehoymehoynee!!!!!!"

10. When bae says to bring that ass over here

— "Bring it arounndddddd town."

11. When bae asks to take off your panties but you aren't wearing any

— "Well, I guess you are going to miss the panty raid...."

12. When bae tries to stick it in but you aren't ready to stop being dominated

— "Assertion... not INSERTION."

13. When geeky white boy whips out and you gasp because there is a 40-ounce in his pants

— "It was big, pink, and scarryyy."

14. When bae says where they are going to shove it and you forget everything but fine dining and breathing

— "LEEDLELEEDLELEEDLE"

15. When they kiss your neck and it makes you quiver but it tickles

*Cue SpongeBob Laughter*

16. When he says to get on your knees

— "If I am lucky, Mr. Talent will rub his tentacles on my art."

17. When bae wants to role play

"I'm Dirty Dan."

Have fun, and make sure you wrap your Krabby Patty up.