If you turn on your TV and flip it to almost any channel, you will eventually be exposed to a society without love. Teenagers are hooking up with each other, claiming that this is a normal thing. Hate crimes are all over the news every day. Mothers and fathers are harming their children. People would rather have a dispute over social media than spend time with their families. It is difficult to come to terms with, but right now my generation is growing up in a society that has forgotten how to love. Not to say that we aren’t part of the problem, because we are a huge part. It is painful for me to watch this every day.

We have forgotten how to love our significant others.

This might be the first thing you thought of when you saw the title of the article, but trust me this goes much further than that, as you will see later. However, this seems to be the most obvious area where we have lost love in this society. We are currently faced with an epic dilemma—the hookup culture. A place where love is completely thrown out the window and sex is taken outside the context of marriage, or even a stable relationship at that. Feelings and emotions are avoided and often times these hook ups amount to nothing but a bunch of one night stands that are later regretted. This environment sets the stage for an unstable relationship, if one is ever able to make it to a true relationship. Those in relationships see their single friends with new flings every night and it makes them question if they really should settle for one person. That, or they remember how they exposed themselves to so many different people sexually and now are constantly comparing their current partner to all of those they were with in their past—an expectation that no one could measure up to. This society has gotten so obsessed with sex that true love has completely vanished and the sanctity of marriage has been ruined. What happened to falling in love with someone based on who they are as a person and how you can see yourselves establishing a life together, rather than if they meet your sexual expectations? This is directly impacting marriages today.

Not only has marriage been impacted in this way, but it has also been made into something way less significant than it used to be. I see couples every day jumping the gun to get engaged and married and then these marriages falling apart within a year. We are so used to instant gratification due to many recent innovations that we expect our romantic relationships to provide this. In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with taking it slow and really figuring out if the relationship is meant to be and if you are prepared to get married before doing so. I think our society has forgotten how meaningful marriage should be and that it should be eternal. Marriage is not just picking a person to make you happy, it is picking a person who will help raise your children and pay your bills. It is forming an eternal promise to always stand by each other, no matter what happens. If this was really what most couples were thinking of when they got married, our divorce rates would not be so high.

This sad portrayal of marriage doesn’t end there. It leads to broken homes and children who grow up with that image in their minds. They don’t see anything wrong with it. It is a never-ending ripple effect. It pains me to grow up in this society, where people are so blind to the concept of truly loving their significant other—something that isn’t dependent on mood or status.

We have forgotten how to love our families.

This is something I watch take place every single day. Dad wants more, so he walks out. The children would rather get caught up in social media, drama, or video games than spend time with their parents. Mom brings sad men into the lives of her children without thinking how it would affect them. The list doesn’t stop there, but the point is we have lost the sacred bond and unity of a family. A family should be a place where each member seeks out the others’ best interests. It should be a team and a place where everyone feels loved.

In my opinion, if a mother really loved her child, she would not get so caught up on her cell phone that she leaves her child to bake and suffocate in the car all day. When is a phone call ever so important that it makes you forget the child that you gave life to? It’s brutal, but these other things of the world have replaced our true love and care for our family members, whether we want to admit it or not. It is sad that it takes a tragic event such as this to wake this society up to the fact that our culture is ripping the family unit apart bit by bit.

I am terrified to start a family of my own in this day and age, as I have seen how hard it is for a family to keep out the noise and focus on loving each other. I fear that our culture will try and pull each member in an opposite direction—preventing real unity from ever being established.

We have forgotten how to love our elders.

It is sad for me to watch the surprised look on an elder’s face when a young person actually opens the door for them. The comments they make each time echo in my mind, “Wow, that was so kind of you,” or “A true gentlemen!” This just shows how much we have abandoned our elders. We have ignored their opinions, as they are “just old grouches," instead of sought after their wisdom. In other cultures, nothing takes place until the elders approve it. The elders call the shots and take care of the people. After all, they have seen many more years than us and have much more experience under their belt. Instead of cramming them all into nursing homes, I wish our society would revere them. We could learn a lot that way.

We have forgotten how to love our neighbors.

With all of the recent problems all over the news, it is evident that we have forgotten how to love our neighbors, regardless of who they are. Racial tensions have been eaten up by the media and spat back into our faces in ways that have caused a lot of anger. People are stereotyping different people groups based on the actions of single members. Political issues have divided us so deeply, that we would rather tear up our friendships than see our friends as more than just Trump or Hillary supporters. We have become so idealistic that it is impossible for any person to meet our expectations of someone who deserves our love, instead of choosing to love all—no matter what their flaws are.

I am growing up in a society that has forgotten how to love—in all senses of the word. We are continuing to grow more and more egocentric and less and less accepting of others. Our needs have to be met before we will even consider the needs of those around us. There are so many problems that have come about, simply due to our lack of love. This makes me realize just how true Jesus’ greatest commandments that He left for us were:

Matthew 22:36-40 (NIV)

³⁶ “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

³⁷ Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ ³⁸ This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹ And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ ⁴⁰ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

When we learn to love God and to open ourselves up to this humility that allows us to love others as ourselves, everything else can fall into place. We must accept the fact that we are failing in our attempts to love on our own. Love cannot exist if pride exists. Pride will exist if we don’t accept our failures and realize God’s sovereignty over our lives. We must not hold other people as lower than ourselves simply because they sin differently than we do. We must not let our love be stripped away and replaced with things of this world or our need for instant gratification. We must rely on God’s great love to pour out of us and into the hearts of those around us because I am tired of growing up in a society that has forgotten how to love.