Ah, social media. It is both a blessing and a curse within this modern world of ours. At our fingertips are millions of different websites and applications that we can use to connect with people we barely remember from high school. People who we met at a bar one time. Distant relatives who still live in your hometown. Old sorority sisters or fraternity brothers that haven't quite let go of their college years. Whatever the person or case may be, we all love to use these devices to keep up with people. There is a certain type of person that uses each type of social media. I often wondered what would it be like if social media were a person, what would they be like. Would I "friend" Facebook? After some careful thinking and a little research on different platforms, I came up with a few theories.
Facebook would be that kid in the popular crowd. Everyone would know who they were, and they would know everyone. Facebook would be the kind of person who would remember your brother's birthday or that you had a piano recital coming up. Facebook would be the kind of person who would remind you that there would be a party Friday night, at their house and the exact time. Facebook would also be very vocal about what they like, what they would listen to, what they are doing, and sometimes it can get a little pushy. You don't want to know every detail of Facebook's life, but you're going to. Even if you thought you put Facebook on do not disturb, they're still going to find a way to let you know what's up.
Instagram would be the artsy kid who would take every photography class your school had available. Don't have actual photography classes? Don't worry, Instagram has started a photography club. Instagram also likes to explore the "vintage" side of things. They most likely will have large rimmed glasses and prefer to listen to music that dates before 1999. They enjoy movies such as "The Breakfast Club" and "Pretty In Pink." Instagram is an old soul who just wants to live in a decade where Polaroid cameras were the only camera of choice. They take their art very seriously and will show you every photo they have. Even when you insist that you have seen them all.
Twitter is a drama kid. They have a flair for the dramatics, a need for attention, a love for approval and will let you know what is on their mind 24/7. They try to keep up with current events but end up sounding like they heard their news secondhand. They most likely have seen all of "Gossip Girl" and believe they are either a Serena or a Blair. They say passive aggressive things in passing, but never outright say what is really bothering them. They talk very fast, very bluntly and when they are funny, they can be outright hilarious.
Snapchat
Snapchat is very immature and will be blunt, much like Twitter. But the difference between Twitter and Snapchat is that Twitter will passive aggressively say how they feel while Snapchat lays it all out on the table. Snapchat shows you what is up and will not be afraid to say they have the evidence to back it up. They don't really have a filter on what they say and say what they think immediately. They are sort of oblivious to the world around them, doing things that aren't quite appropriate. But who cares right? Snapchat is the living embodiment of the word "YOLO" and they are still using it strongly in even in 2016. They pick up on the latest trend and go with it.
Vine
Vine is the class clown. Always looking to get a quick laugh or use their quick wit to get out of trouble. Vine will always try to pick you up when you are feeling down. They wear lots of bright patterns and colors. Much like Snapchat, Vine goes with the latest trends. Vine loves whatever humor is lingering around the internet, but not for too long. They don't like to be in the same place twice and like to be spontaneous. They aren't afraid to go on an adventure and try something new every once and a while.
Tumblr
Tumblr is the token quiet and "strange" kid. They are in multiple fandoms and will tell you about all of them. All. Of. Them. They like to stay in tune with all of the current events and won't put up for any SJW stuff. They like things their own way and tend to have strong opinions on, well, everything. They have a quirky sense of humor that can appeal to just about everyone. Tumblr is the person that will experiment with their hair a million different ways, have many piercings and are very open minded. They also have a soft side for poetry and a love for words.
Wow, does Pinterest love crafting. They are the type of person who loves home remedies, fashion, cooking and anything that would keep them productive. They have their whole lives planned out, from the napkins they have at their wedding to the type of scarves they will sew for their future children. They love shopping. Pinterest has an impulsive personality. They will buy things without a second thought, get a tattoo of a quote they've heard once or dye their hair with Kool-Aid. They love to keep track of all the things they've created and show them to the world because they're just so "good at crafting."
LinkedIn is all business, all the time. They are always looking for something to improve their resume, whether it be a summer internship or learning a new skill. They are always thinking ahead and about their future. LinkedIn is the type of person who would have majored in a very specific field in college, such as biochemical engineering, or in something that is trending now, such as computer science. They most likely keep up with the stock market and know what's really going on on Wall Street. They own a good amount of professional wear and will help you with your upcoming interview.
MySpace
Either you are a scene kid stuck in 2008 still listening to My Chemical Romance and Blood on the Dance Floor.
Or you are Tom. The creator of Myspace.
Either way, good luck.
