I try to be as inclusive as possible with my language because I know what it's like to have someone say something that can be triggering or offensive to you. And good people tend to surround themselves with good people, so I've noticed that my friends also try to be mindful of the things they say.

But coming here, and just being out in the world, I've noticed that not everyone does this and there are lots of things that I consider to be slurs that other people just go on saying without any real thought.

The first and probably the best example I can think of this is people who still use the word "gay" as an insult.

As in something bad happens or something they don't like, and their first reaction is "that's gay." I seriously thought people had stopped saying that because nobody around me does. But then I heard someone say that some appliance in their home is "acting gay." My first confusion with that is inanimate objects don't have sexual orientations so grammatically that doesn't make sense. Second of all, why is gay used as an insult when there are literally so many worse things a person could be. SO MANY.

Another thing I hear quite often is the r-word, which is often used to describe dumb, useless or unnecessary. But people who defend their use of that word in reference to a rule or regulation often say, "I'd never use it in front of a person with a mental disability." But my follow-up question is often, well then why are you using it at all? I cringe when I hear it so I can't imagine how people with actual disabilities feel when people use that word around them.

There are a whole host of racial slurs and I'm not going to get into them because that could be an article in itself, but I recognize that they exist and that they're wrong.

These are just two examples but there are so many more. And the reason I feel like I need to say something about it is because you can remove things from your vocabulary. You can.

I don't wanna hear about how difficult it will be. Or that you don't know how. Those are what I call excuses. Nobody likes excuses.

And not only is the goal for you to stop repeating slurs but if you hear the people around you saying things that seem insensitive, correct them. It costs zero dollars and it reinforces that you shouldn't say bad things, and it helps them realize why what they said is harmful. If they're a good friend or person, they won't be offended.

Language is difficult and expansive but can be personal and special. There are so many words in the English language, y'all. SO MANY.

So you truly don't have to continue to use that problematic word or phrase you've been using since middle school.