I am well aware that the topic I am about to bring up may spark a wave of controversy among some readers, but I think it is worth the share.

From today's hits on the radio to just friendly conversations between friends, simple racial jabs seem to be thrown in almost every aspect of our daily lives. When did we decide that it was okay to use such terms loosely, discrediting the struggle that different groups of people went through to fight against such words and phrases?

As an African American female growing up in the city, I have been exposed to a great deal of culture, from the people I have worked with, to the classmates I have had. The one thing that I have learned not to tolerate is social slurs; saying things like the "N" word and using phrases like, "That's so gay," without reason or thought behind it. Of course, there are more terms and phrases that are used loosely just like these two, but for me and the people that I am around, they seem to be the most common.

It is shocking to me how black individuals seem to find comfort in addressing each other using the "N" word, or how some people in the gay community accept it when one of their straight friends blurts out the phrase, "That's so gay,"…referring to a common event that they find boring, or lame.

It's an alarming concept to think about.

I have a friend (I have other friends as well but in reference to this specific friend and this topic) who is the nicest person you could ever meet. She is down to earth, religiously spiritual, and will drop anything to come and help someone in need. However, there is one small quirk about her: she doesn't swear. So, naturally when I found this little fact out I was curious as to why that was the case. For her, it comes down to a comfort thing, she isn't comfortable using such strong, aggressive language, and that's OK. With that said, and knowing her for a while, you can imagine my surprise when I heard her singing along with one of today's common songs on the radio and say the "N" word without hesitation

Naturally I asked her: why she was okay with saying that word in songs lyrics and not okay with swearing. The conversation was very awkward and I could tell she felt bad while I was confronting her. She gave me no good reason and said it wasn't as bad of a word for her.

As confused as that makes me I believe that it stems from not speaking up, "If you see something say something," right? So let's start with the conversation, don't be afraid.