The Mean, And Honestly Kind Of Gross, Truth About Living In A House Filled With Women
A compilation of some, but not all, of my famiy's crazy stories
For the first fifteen years of my life, I lived in a house with just my mom and my sisters. A few years ago, my stepdad moved in with us, which is a completely different experience, and a story for another time. Regardless, my house is mostly made up of girls, and it can be crazy. Here's a look into our, somewhat interesting, everyday lives.
Girls Are Gross (And So Weird):
Seriously, most people tend to think men are nastier, but none of them come close to the women in my family. Girls, in general, pass gas like you can't believe. And, one of us, I'm not saying who, can completely burp the alphabet. Also, once, one of my sisters peed in the sink.
In her defense, she did have a prior injury that made it impossible for her to "hold it" for more than a couple minutes, and someone else was using the toilet, but still. When we were really little, we used to sit back to back and try to use the toilet at the same time.
Perhaps my favorite example of girls being really weird is this: one of my sisters used to come out of the bathroom stark naked after showering and shimmied around, while singing a song she had made up. She called this little skit "The Ursula." Wow, my mom really just couldn't give me one brother.
Girls Can Be Really Mean:
Initially, my sister was fully potty-trained by the age of 2. I, being the amazing older sister I am, took it upon myself to tell her that if she sat on the toilet for too long, a monster would suck her in.
Needless to say, my mom had to completely re-potty train her, and reports that she would, "Literally scream if you sat her on the toilet." You're welcome, mom. I also sort of used to be afraid my sister was actually going to kill me, always a pleasant feeling.
Oh, and once, my sister slapped me in the face, in the middle of the restaurant, for telling our younger sister that she'd kissed a boy. Having sisters is great.
All The Hormones:
Obviously, girls cry. My family is no exception. Again, there's four of us in my house, that's a whole lot of estrogen (God bless my step dad.) On any given day, I can promise you, one of us has cried, but there's one story that completely takes the cake.
While one of my sisters had the flu (therefore, already being very emotional) the family somehow got on the topic of Bob Ross, whom she didn't know was dead.
It wasn't his death that made her hysterically cry for over an hour, and then off and on for the next two days, but the fact the he had past multiple years before she was born, and that she "Never truly got to see a happy tree." Enough said.
All The Good Times:
Despite all of that craziness, I wouldn't have it any other way. My sisters and my mom are my very best friends and I love them endlessly. They always have my back and I definitley have theirs, and we're all so supportive of each other.
I may complain about them a lot, but they're easily the funnies, best people I've ever met. Y'all are definitely missing out by not getting the chance to live in my house, let me tell you.