Media has created this barrier for skinny girls. We are not allowed to talk about our struggles with our weight, because all we have to do is eat more and be happy; we have a fast metabolism, or we get slammed with eating disorder labels. In most cases, that is not the case. It's easier said then done. I'm sharing my life-long struggle with my weight, because I want to break the barrier. On a November day, a baby was born prematurely. A month and one day early, to be exact. She was four pounds and twelve ounces. That girl was me, obviously. I was not allowed to leave the hospital until they were able to get me to eat. So, now you have some background that I was always small. Now for the rest of the story.
Fast forward about fifteen years:
I went to a doctor's appointment and found out I lost two pounds. I thought nothing of it, but because I went from 85 lbs to 83 lbs, they threw a fit. A month later, I began to lose more weight. At first it was slowly, but then over the summer I went down to 67 lbs.
Many medications, x-rays, ultra sounds, urine tests, over 20 vials of blood drawn, stool samples, colonoscopy and endoscopy attempts later, I began to gain more and more weight. My weight gain really began to escalate when I stopped going to doctors for help. I began to drink more and train my body to rid itself of waste independently.
It's been three years since then, and I officially weigh more than I ever have. I now weigh 90.4 lbs. I also have the Freshman 15 to thank. Women are ashamed to share their weight, but why not? Be proud of your bodies. Be proud to be unique!
I want to thank everyone who believed in me. Everyone who helped me gain weight. Everyone who lifted up my spirits. Every teacher that allowed me to eat in their class. Everyone who did not push me. And everyone who loved me at my weakest and when I felt awful about myself. My journey is far from over, and I hope you all will stick with me for the rest of the way.
